I would like to find a service similar to Google App Engine for PHP/ MySQL/ Postgres sites/ applications.

We host two different types of site.

i). PHP/ Mysql/ Zend Framework

<VirtualHost *:80>
   DocumentRoot "/home/websites/website.com/public"
   ServerName website.com

   # This should be omitted in the production environment
   SetEnv APPLICATION_ENV development

   <Directory "/home/websites/website.com/public">
       Options Indexes MultiViews FollowSymLinks
       AllowOverride All
       Order allow,deny
       Allow from all

        RewriteEngine On
        RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} -s [OR]
        RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} -l [OR]
        RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} -d
        RewriteRule ^.*$ - [NC,L]
        RewriteRule ^.*$ index.php [NC,L]
   </Directory>

</VirtualHost>

ii). Matrix CMS - PHP/ Postgres + loads of pear classes

<VirtualHost *:80>
ServerName server.example.com
DocumentRoot /home/websites/mysource_matrix/core/web

Options -Indexes FollowSymLinks

<Directory /home/websites/mysource_matrix>
  Order deny,allow
  Deny from all
</Directory>
<DirectoryMatch "^/home/websites/mysource_matrix/(core/(web|lib)|data/public|fudge)">
  Order allow,deny
  Allow from all
</DirectoryMatch>
<DirectoryMatch "^/home/websites/mysource_matrix/data/public/assets">
  php_flag engine off
</DirectoryMatch>

<FilesMatch "\.inc$">
  Order allow,deny
  Deny from all
</FilesMatch>
<LocationMatch "/(CVS|\.FFV)/">
  Order allow,deny
  Deny from all
</LocationMatch>

Alias /__fudge   /home/websites/mysource_matrix/fudge
Alias /__data    /home/websites/mysource_matrix/data/public
Alias /__lib     /home/websites/mysource_matrix/core/lib
Alias /          /home/websites/mysource_matrix/core/web/index.php/
</VirtualHost>

My key requirements are:

1. I don't want to worry/ know/ care about the server/ infrastructure
2. Secure/ up to date software/ os
3. Good monitoring
4. Automatic scalability
5. SLA

I apologise for the length of the question.

In short all I want to do is i). create vhost, ii). create db iii). install app/ site iv). relax.

Thanks.

Edit:

I include the Matrix vhost because that is the only complication that I cannot really do via a .htaccess file.