personal growth - Page 125

Noob with git repository on Windows Storage Server 2008?

- by HibbyHoo

I have a Western Digital Sentinel at home running Windows Storage Server 2008 R2 Essentials. I have several git repositories on it for my own personal projects, and have no problem pushing and pulling over my local network. I want to be able to access those repos remotely from anywhere. I am able to log in and remotely access folders and files on it, but I cannot clone repos using the same address. It hangs for a REALLY long time before finally failing with an error: git.exe clone --progress -v "https://myIpAddressHere/Remote/fs/files.aspx?path=%5C%5Cmydevicename%5Cmyreposfolder%5Cmyrepo.git" "D:\repo" Cloning into 'D:\repo'... error: Failed connect to myIpAddress:443; No error while accessing https://myIpAddress/Remote/fs/files.aspx?path=%5C%5Cmydevicename%5Cmyreposfolder%5Cmyrepo.git/info/refs fatal: HTTP request failed git did not exit cleanly (exit code 128) I'm not too privy to networking or web development, and I have only a rudimentary understanding of how to use git (with TortoiseGit). I'm having a hard time finding search results for this specific problem and a hard time interpreting generic tutorials for the general scope of this problem. TortoiseGit version: 1.7.13.0. git version: 1.7.10.mysysgit.1.

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Auto-restart mysql when it dies

- by Los Frijoles

I have a rackspace server that I have been renting to run my personal projects upon. Since I am cheap, it has 256Mb of RAM and honestly can't handle alot. Every once in a while, when there is a sharp uptick in traffic, the server decides to start killing processes and it seems that mysqld is a popular one for it to kill. I try to visit my site and am greeted with the message that there was an error establishing the database connection. Inspection of the logs reveals that mysqld was killed due to lack of memory. Since I am still as poor as I was yesterday and don't want to upgrade my rackspace VM's RAM, is there a way I can tell it to automagically restart mysqld when it dies? I have a thought to use something like crontab, but alas, I don't know exactly what to do there either. I guess I am product of the "Linux on your desktop" generation since I can do most things on my desktop and laptop (which run Linux almost exclusively), but still lack a lot of server administration skills for Linux. The server runs CentOS 6.3

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Notes from AT&T ARO Session at Oredev 2013

- by Geertjan

The mobile internet is 12 times bigger than internet was 12 years ago. Explosive growth, faster networks, and more powerful devices. 85% of users prefer mobile apps, while 56% have problems. Almost 60% want less than 2 second mobile app startup. App with poor mobile experience results in not buying stuff, going to competitor, not liking your company. Battery life. Bad mobile app is worse than no app at all because it turns people away from brand, etc. Apps didn't exist 10 years ago, 72 billion dollars a year in 2013, 151 billion in 2017.Testing performance. Mobile is different than regular app. Need to fix issues before customers discover them. ARO is free and open source AT&T tool for identifying mobile app performance problems. Mobile data is different -- radio resource control state machine. Radio resource control -- radio from idle to continuous reception -- drains battery, sends data, packets coming through, after packets come through radio is still on which is tail time, after 10 seconds of no data coming through radio goes off. For example, YouTube, e.g., 10 to 15 seconds after every connection, can be huge drain on battery, app traffic triggers RRC state. Goal. Balance fast network connectivity against battery usage. ARO is free and open source and test any platform and won awards. How do I test my app? pcap or tcdump network. Native collector: Android and iOS. Android rooted device is needed. Test app on phone, background data, idle for ads and analytics. Graded against 25 best practices. See all the processes, all network traffic mapped to processes, stats about trace, can look just at your app, exlude Facebook, etc. Many tests conducted, e.g., file download, HTML (wrapped applications, e.g., cordova). Best Practices. Make stuff smaller. GZIP, smaller files, download faster, best for files larger than 800 bytes, minification -- remove tabs and commenting -- browser doesn't need that, just give processor what it needs remove wheat from chaff. Images -- make images smaller, 1024x1024 image for a checkmark, swish it, make it 33% smaller, ARO records the screen, probably could be 9 times smaller. Download less stuff. 17% of HTTP content on mobile is duplicate data because of caching, reloading from cache is 75% to 99% faster than downloading again, 75% possible savings which means app will start up faster because using cache -- everyone wants app starting up 2 seconds. Make fewer HTTP requests. Inline and combine CSS and JS when possible reduces the number of requests, spread images used often. Fewer connections. Faster and use less battery, for example, download an image every 60 secs, download an add every 60 seconds, send analytics every 60 seconds -- instead of that, use transaction manager, download everything at once, reduce amount of time connected to network by 40% also -- 80% of applications do NOT close connections when they are finished, e.g., download picture, 10 seconds later the radio turns off, if you do not explicitly close, eventually server closes, 38% more tail time, 40% less energy if you close connection right away, background data traffic is 27% of data and 55% of network time, this kills the battery. Look at redirection. Adds 200 to 600 ms on each connection, waterfall diagram to all the requests -- e.g., xyz.com redirect to www.xyz.com redirect to xyz.mobi to www.xyz.com, waterfall visualization of packets, minimize redirects but redirects are fine. HTML best practices. Order matters and hiding code (JS downloading blocks rendering, always do CSS before JS or JS asynchronously, CSS 'display:none' hides images from user but the browser downloads them which adds latency to application. Some apps turn on GPS for no reason. Tell network when down, but maybe some other app is using the radio at the same time. It's all about knowing best practices: everyone wins with ARO (carriers, e.g., AT&T, developers, customers). Faster apps, better battery usage, network traffic better, better app reviews, happier customers. MBTA app, referenced as an example.ARO is free, open source, can test all platforms.

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CentOS and OpenSSH [on hold]

- by Stephen

I've recently installed CentOS 6 on an old Dell PC. I'm trying to setup OpenSSH at the moment, I been following some tutorials (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKafb0koJEg) on You Tube, while they have been very helpful I'm at the point where I need to ask some questions. My goal here is to be able to access the server from my work computer and from my personal laptop (which will be on the same home network as the server). I've installed OpenSSH with no issues. So the first thing I was advised to do was port forwarding. So in the sshd_config file, I've changed Port 22 to Port xxxx (where xxxx is a obviously a four digit value). I then restart the sshd service. I've also configured my router for forward port 22 onto xxxx. Is there anything else I need to do? I've generated the keys on my laptop, and I'm trying to copy them to the server as follows: scp id_rsa.pub xxxxxxxx@localhost:.ssh/authorized_keys but this command fails with the following error message: ssh: connect to host localhost port 22: Connection refused lost connection Any help appreciated. Regards...

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What is a good replacement for StumbleUpon's Share feature?

- by Mofoo

I've been using Firefox + StumbleUpon's Share feature with my friends for years now. It is a perfect way of sharing links directly with your friends. You first need to be Following each other and then on the SU toolbar, you can "Share" with your list of friends. You can even include a personal message. The friend will receive a notification with # of pending shares in their toolbar (bold & red). They click the stumble button and it will navigate to the site plus show a yellow bar with your message. I literally use it daily. But then Chrome came along and beat the tar out of Firefox (and other browsers) in terms of usability and performance. But it doesn't (and never will according to Google) allow toolbars. StumbleUpon's solution in Chrome is a fake toolbar (html) that gets injected into the page you're viewing. It's buggy and performance is low. Overall it's not an acceptable solution. I'm looking for a replacement with something that is just as easy to send/receive links. I was thinking of Twitter DM's and using a bookmarklet, but I wanted to survey the collective for other options Thanks in advance for your input!

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How do I tunnel an HTTPS proxy through a virtual machine (VMWare)

- by Kyle

I have a personal setup at home using VMWare Workstation. I also have a set of Virtual Private Machines that run Squid, and therefore provide me HTTPS proxy tunnels. Using Proxifier, I can tunnel all traffic for given applications through these tunnels. However, I also have a few virtual machines for dev/staging/experimentation/etc. I generally just use NAT to provide Internet access to the machines, and if I need to use these proxies, I can just setup Proxifier (or a Linux equivalent) to pipe the traffic through them. No problem. But... I got to thinking: Wouldn't it be great if I could assign these proxy tunnels to a virtual machine, so that when I start up the VM, it has instant-on access through the tunnel and not my local connection? (EDIT: Of course, it would USE my local connection, but it would tunnel traffic through the proxy.) To be more clear: I want a solution that binds the proxy to a VM, so that when I start the VM, I don't have to use a proxy client to connect to the tunnel - I am already piping all traffic from that VM through that proxy. I did a bit of searching, and the closest thing I could find was this: How to route public static IP to a virtual machine on a vmware ESXi host? Which wasn't all that applicable. The proxies are protected by user/pass but do not filter by IP. Again, they are HTTPS proxies setup through Squid. Any ideas on how to make this happen? Thanks a ton.

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Which Windows 8 tool should I use to "read", "upload", my Windows 7 latest backup DVD (is it possible?)

- by Robert

Which Windows 8 tool should I use to "read", "upload", my Windows 7 latest backup DVD (is it possible?). I've just installed W8 and haven't made any changes to my new ecosystem and, what happened was that, as I was managing my new drivers, some mess* occurred, I confess, and now what I have left is every single backup tool I made use of W7, like system images, restore dvds, backup up to date monthly and so on, and would like to keep in touch with W8. I'm one of those with problems managing the amd switchable gpu drivers. Now I want to stay with W8 (download version - didn't clean install) but with my old personal files. I don't care to programs updates. I got everything original on dvds, of my interest. Yesterday I tried refreshing W8 once but didn't work. Maybe trying again tonight. What would you guys do in my place, please? *the mess I am talking about is to have disabled my intel (the only driver left) gpu in device manager tool in W8. I got black screen on system boot. Cheers, C.C.

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PHP/MySQL Swap places in database + JavaScript (jQuery)

- by James Brooks

I'm currently developing a website which stores bookmarks in a MySQL database using PHP and jQuery. The MySQL for bookmarks looks like this (CSV format): id,userid,link_count,url,title,description,tags,shareid,fav,date "1";"1";"0";"img/test/google.png";"Google";"Best. Search Engine. Ever.";"google, search, engine";"7nbsp";"0";"1267578934" "2";"1";"1";"img/test/james-brooks.png";"jTutorials";"Best. jQuery Tutorials. Ever.";"jquery, jtutorials, tutorials";"8nbsp";"0";"1267578934" "3";"1";"2";"img/test/benokshosting.png";"Benoks Hosting";"Cheap website hosting";"Benoks, Hosting, server, linux, cpanel";"9nbsp;";"0";"1267578934" "4";"1";"3";"img/test/jbrooks.png";"James Brooks";"Personal website FTW!";"james, brooks, jbrooksuk, blog, personal, portfolio";"1nbsp";"0";"1267578934" "6";"1";"4";"img/test/linkbase.png";"LinkBase";"Store and organise your bookmarks and access them from anywhere!";"linkbase, bookmarks, organisation";"3nbsp";"0";"1267578934" "5";"1";"5";"img/test/jtutorials.png";"jTutorials";"jQuery tutorials, videos and examples!";"jquery, jtutorials, tutorials";"2nbsp";"0";"1267578934" I'm using jQuery Sortable to move the bookmarks around (similar to how Google Chrome does). Here is the JavaScript code I use to format the bookmarks and post the data to the PHP page: $(".bookmarks").sortable({scroll: false, update: function(event, ui){ // Update bookmark position in the database when the bookmark is dropped var newItems = $("ul.bookmarks").sortable('toArray'); console.log(newItems); var oldItems = ""; for(var imgI=0;imgI < newItems.length;imgI++) { oldItems += $("ul.bookmarks li#" + imgI + " img").attr("id") + ","; } oldItems = oldItems.slice(0, oldItems.length-1); console.log("New position: " + newItems); console.log("Old position: " + oldItems); // Post the data $.post('inc/updateBookmarks.php', 'update=true&olditems=' + oldItems + "&newitems=" + newItems, function(r) { console.log(r); }); } }); The PHP page then goes about splitting the posted arrays using explode, like so: if(isset($pstUpdate)) { // Get the current and new positions $arrOldItems = $_POST['olditems']; $arrOldItems = explode(",", $arrOldItems); $arrNewItems = $_POST['newitems']; $arrNewItems = explode(",", $arrNewItems); // Get the user id $usrID = $U->user_field('id'); // Update the old place to the new one for($anID=0;$anID<count($arrOldItems);$anID++) { //echo "UPDATE linkz SET link_count='" . $arrNewItems[$anID] . "' WHERE userid='" . $usrID . "' AND link_count='" . $arrOldItems[$anID] . "'\n"; //echo "SELECT id FROM linkz WHERE link_id='".$arrOldItems[$anID]."' AND userid='".$usrID."'"; $curLinkID = mysql_fetch_array(mysql_query("SELECT id FROM linkz WHERE link_count='".$arrOldItems[$anID]."' AND userid='".$usrID."'")) or die(mysql_error()); echo $arrOldItems[$anID] . " => " . $arrNewItems[$anID] . " => " . $curLinkID['id'] . "\n"; //mysql_query("UPDATE linkz SET link_count='" . $arrNewItems[$anID] . "' WHERE userid='" . $usrID . "' AND link_count='" . $curLinkID['id'] . "'") or die(mysql_error()); // Join a string with the new positions $outPos .= $arrNewItems[$anID] . "|"; } echo substr($outPos, 0, strlen($outPost) - 1); } So, each bookmark is given it's own link_count id (which starts from 0 for each user). Every time a bookmark is changed, I need the link_count to be changed as needed. If we take this array output as the starting places: Array ( [0] => 0 [1] => 1 [2] => 2 [3] => 3 [4] => 4 [5] => 5 ) Each index equalling the link_count position, the resulting update would become: Array ( [0] => 1 [1] => 0 [2] => 3 [3] => 4 [4] => 5 [5] => 2 ) I have tried many ways but none are successful. Thanks in advance.

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agent-based simulation: performance issue: Python vs NetLogo & Repast

- by max

I'm replicating a small piece of Sugarscape agent simulation model in Python 3. I found the performance of my code is ~3 times slower than that of NetLogo. Is it likely the problem with my code, or can it be the inherent limitation of Python? Obviously, this is just a fragment of the code, but that's where Python spends two-thirds of the run-time. I hope if I wrote something really inefficient it might show up in this fragment: UP = (0, -1) RIGHT = (1, 0) DOWN = (0, 1) LEFT = (-1, 0) all_directions = [UP, DOWN, RIGHT, LEFT] # point is just a tuple (x, y) def look_around(self): max_sugar_point = self.point max_sugar = self.world.sugar_map[self.point].level min_range = 0 random.shuffle(self.all_directions) for r in range(1, self.vision+1): for d in self.all_directions: p = ((self.point[0] + r * d[0]) % self.world.surface.length, (self.point[1] + r * d[1]) % self.world.surface.height) if self.world.occupied(p): # checks if p is in a lookup table (dict) continue if self.world.sugar_map[p].level > max_sugar: max_sugar = self.world.sugar_map[p].level max_sugar_point = p if max_sugar_point is not self.point: self.move(max_sugar_point) Roughly equivalent code in NetLogo (this fragment does a bit more than the Python function above): ; -- The SugarScape growth and motion procedures. -- to M ; Motion rule (page 25) locals [ps p v d] set ps (patches at-points neighborhood) with [count turtles-here = 0] if (count ps > 0) [ set v psugar-of max-one-of ps [psugar] ; v is max sugar w/in vision set ps ps with [psugar = v] ; ps is legal sites w/ v sugar set d distance min-one-of ps [distance myself] ; d is min dist from me to ps agents set p random-one-of ps with [distance myself = d] ; p is one of the min dist patches if (psugar >= v and includeMyPatch?) [set p patch-here] setxy pxcor-of p pycor-of p ; jump to p set sugar sugar + psugar-of p ; consume its sugar ask p [setpsugar 0] ; .. setting its sugar to 0 ] set sugar sugar - metabolism ; eat sugar (metabolism) set age age + 1 end On my computer, the Python code takes 15.5 sec to run 1000 steps; on the same laptop, the NetLogo simulation running in Java inside the browser finishes 1000 steps in less than 6 sec. EDIT: Just checked Repast, using Java implementation. And it's also about the same as NetLogo at 5.4 sec. Recent comparisons between Java and Python suggest no advantage to Java, so I guess it's just my code that's to blame? EDIT: I understand MASON is supposed to be even faster than Repast, and yet it still runs Java in the end.

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Designing a database file format

- by RoliSoft

I would like to design my own database engine for educational purposes, for the time being. Designing a binary file format is not hard nor the question, I've done it in the past, but while designing a database file format, I have come across a very important question: How to handle the deletion of an item? So far, I've thought of the following two options: Each item will have a "deleted" bit which is set to 1 upon deletion. Pro: relatively fast. Con: potentially sensitive data will remain in the file. 0x00 out the whole item upon deletion. Pro: potentially sensitive data will be removed from the file. Con: relatively slow. Recreating the whole database. Pro: no empty blocks which makes the follow-up question void. Con: it's a really good idea to overwrite the whole 4 GB database file because a user corrected a typo. I will sell this method to Twitter ASAP! Now let's say you already have a few empty blocks in your database (deleted items). The follow-up question is how to handle the insertion of a new item? Append the item to the end of the file. Pro: fastest possible. Con: file will get huge because of all the empty blocks that remain because deleted items aren't actually deleted. Search for an empty block exactly the size of the one you're inserting. Pro: may get rid of some blocks. Con: you may end up scanning the whole file at each insert only to find out it's very unlikely to come across a perfectly fitting empty block. Find the first empty block which is equal or larger than the item you're inserting. Pro: you probably won't end up scanning the whole file, as you will find an empty block somewhere mid-way; this will keep the file size relatively low. Con: there will still be lots of leftover 0x00 bytes at the end of items which were inserted into bigger empty blocks than they are. Rigth now, I think the first deletion method and the last insertion method are probably the "best" mix, but they would still have their own small issues. Alternatively, the first insertion method and scheduled full database recreation. (Probably not a good idea when working with really large databases. Also, each small update in that method will clone the whole item to the end of the file, thus accelerating file growth at a potentially insane rate.) Unless there is a way of deleting/inserting blocks from/to the middle of the file in a file-system approved way, what's the best way to do this? More importantly, how do databases currently used in production usually handle this?

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Symfony2 Entity to array

- by Adriano Pedro

I'm trying to migrate my flat php project to Symfony2, but its coming to be very hard. For instance, I have a table of Products specification that have several specifications and are distinguishables by its "cat" attribute in that Extraspecs DB table. Therefore I've created a Entity for that table and want to make an array of just the specifications with "cat" = 0... I supose the code is this one.. right? $typeavailable = $this->getDoctrine() ->getRepository('LabsCatalogBundle:ProductExtraspecsSpecs') ->findBy(array('cat' => '0')); Now how can i put this in an array to work with a form like this?: form = $this ->createFormBuilder($product) ->add('specs', 'choice', array('choices' => $typeavailableArray), 'multiple' => true) Thank you in advance :) # Thank you all.. But now I've came across with another problem.. In fact i'm building a form from an existing object: $form = $this ->createFormBuilder($product) ->add('name', 'text') ->add('genspec', 'choice', array('choices' => array('0' => 'None', '1' => 'General', '2' => 'Specific'))) ->add('isReg', 'choice', array('choices' => array('0' => 'Material', '1' => 'Reagent', '2' => 'Antibody', '3' => 'Growth Factors', '4' => 'Rodents', '5' => 'Lagomorphs'))) So.. in that case my current value is named "extraspecs", so i've added this like: ->add('extraspecs', 'entity', array( 'label' => 'desc', 'empty_value' => ' --- ', 'class' => 'LabsCatalogBundle:ProductExtraspecsSpecs', 'property' => 'specsid', 'query_builder' => function(EntityRepository $er) { return $er ->createQueryBuilder('e'); But "extraspecs" come from a relationship of oneToMany where every product has several extraspecs... Here is the ORM: Labs\CatalogBundle\Entity\Product: type: entity table: orders__regmat id: id: type: integer generator: { strategy: AUTO } fields: name: type: string length: 100 catnumber: type: string scale: 100 brand: type: integer scale: 10 company: type: integer scale: 10 size: type: decimal scale: 10 units: type: integer scale: 10 price: type: decimal scale: 10 reqcert: type: integer scale: 1 isReg: type: integer scale: 1 genspec: type: integer scale: 1 oneToMany: extraspecs: targetEntity: ProductExtraspecs mappedBy: product Labs\CatalogBundle\Entity\ProductExtraspecs: type: entity table: orders__regmat__extraspecs fields: extraspecid: id: true type: integer unsigned: false nullable: false generator: strategy: IDENTITY regmatid: type: integer scale: 11 spec: type: integer scale: 11 attrib: type: string length: 20 value: type: string length: 200 lifecycleCallbacks: { } manyToOne: product: targetEntity: Product inversedBy: extraspecs joinColumn: name: regmatid referencedColumnName: id HOw should I do this? Thank you!!!

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How to maxmise the largest contiguous block of memory in the Large Object Heap

- by Unsliced

The situation is that I am making a WCF call to a remote server which is returns an XML document as a string. Most of the time this return value is a few K, sometimes a few dozen K, very occasionally a few hundred K, but very rarely it could be several megabytes (first problem is that there is no way for me to know). It's these rare occasions that are causing grief. I get a stack trace that starts: System.OutOfMemoryException: Exception of type 'System.OutOfMemoryException' was thrown. at System.Xml.BufferBuilder.AddBuffer() at System.Xml.BufferBuilder.AppendHelper(Char* pSource, Int32 count) at System.Xml.BufferBuilder.Append(Char[] value, Int32 start, Int32 count) at System.Xml.XmlTextReaderImpl.ParseText() at System.Xml.XmlTextReaderImpl.ParseElementContent() at System.Xml.XmlTextReaderImpl.Read() at System.Xml.XmlTextReader.Read() at System.Xml.XmlReader.ReadElementString() at Microsoft.Xml.Serialization.GeneratedAssembly.XmlSerializationReaderMDRQuery.Read2_getMarketDataResponse() at Microsoft.Xml.Serialization.GeneratedAssembly.ArrayOfObjectSerializer2.Deserialize(XmlSerializationReader reader) at System.Xml.Serialization.XmlSerializer.Deserialize(XmlReader xmlReader, String encodingStyle, XmlDeserializationEvents events) at System.Xml.Serialization.XmlSerializer.Deserialize(XmlReader xmlReader, String encodingStyle) at System.Web.Services.Protocols.SoapHttpClientProtocol.ReadResponse(SoapClientMessage message, WebResponse response, Stream responseStream, Boolean asyncCall) at System.Web.Services.Protocols.SoapHttpClientProtocol.Invoke(String methodName, Object[] parameters) I've read around and it is because the Large Object Heap is just getting too fragmented, so even preceding the call with a quick check to StringBuilder.EnsureCapacity just causes the OutOfMemoryException to be thrown earlier (and because I'm guessing at what's needed, it might not actually need that much so my check is causing more problems than it is solving). Some opinions are that there's not much I can do about it. Some of the questions I've asked myself: Use less memory - have you checked for leaks? Yes. The memory usage goes up and down, but there's no fundamental growth that guarantees this to happen. Some of the times it fails, it succeeded at that stage previously. Transfer smaller amounts Not an option, this is a third party web service over which I have no control (or at least it would take a long time to resolve, in the meantime I still have a problem) Can you do something to the LOH to make it less likely to fail? ... now this is most fruitful course. It's a 32-bit process (it has to be for various political, technical and boring reasons) but there's normally hundreds of meg free (multiples of the largest amount for which we've seen failures). Can we monitor the LOH? Using perfmon I can track the size of the heaps, but I don't think there's a way to monitor the largest available contiguous block of memory. Question is: any advice or suggestions for things to try?

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Adding a clustered index to a SQL table: what dangers exist for a live production system?

- by MoSlo

Right, keep in mind i need to describe this by abstracting all possible confidential info: I've been put in charge of a 10-year old transactional system of which the majority business logic is implemented at database level (triggers, stored procedures etc). Win2000 server, MSSQL 2000 Enterprise. No immediate plans for replacing/updating the system are being considered :( The core process is a program that executes transactions - specifically, it executes a stored procedure with various parameters, lets call it sp_ProcessTrans. The program executes the stored procedure at asynchronous intervals. By itself, things work fine. But there are 30 instances of this program on remotely located workstations, all of them asynchronously executing sp_ProcessTrans and then retrieving data from the SQL server (execution is pretty regular - ranging 0 to 60 times a minute, depending on what items the program instance is responsible for) . Performance of the system has dropped considerably with 10 yrs of data growth: the reason is the deadlocks and specifically deadlock wait times. The deadlock is on the Employee table. I have discovered: In sp_ProcessTrans' execution, it selects from an Employee table 7 times (dont ask) The select is done on a field that is NOT the primary key No index exists on this field. Thus a table scan is performed. 7 times. per transaction So the reason for deadlocks is clear. I created a non-unique ordered clustered index on the field (field looks good, almost unique, NUM(7), very rarely changes). Immediate improvement in the test environment. The problem is that i cannot simulate the deadlocks in a test environment (I'd need 30 workstations; i'd need to simulate 'realistic' activity on those stations, so visualization is out). I need to know if i must schedule downtime. Creating an index shouldn't be a risky operation for MSSQL, but is there any danger (data corruption in transactions/select statements/extra wait time etc) to create this field index on the production database while the transactions are still taking place? (although i can select a time when transactions are fairly quiet through the 30 stations) Are there any hidden dangers i'm not seeing (not looking forward to needing to restore the DB if something goes wrong, restoring would take a lot of time with 10yrs of data).

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SQLAuthority News – Speaking Sessions at TechEd India – 3 Sessions – 1 Panel Discussion

- by pinaldave

Microsoft Tech-Ed India 2010 is considered as the major Technology event of the year for various IT professionals and developers. This event will feature a comprehensive forum in order to learn, connect, explore, and evolve the current technologies we have today. I would recommend this event to you since here you will learn about today’s cutting-edge trends, thereby enhancing your work profile and getting ahead of the rest. But, the most important benefit of all might be the networking opportunity that that you can attain by attending the forum. You can build personal connections with various Microsoft experts and peers that will last even far beyond this event! It also feels good to let you know that I will be speaking at this year’s event! So, here are the sessions that await you in this mega-forum. Session 1: True Lies of SQL Server – SQL Myth Buster Date: April 12, 2010 Time: 11:15pm – 11:45pm In this 30-minute demo session, I am going to briefly demonstrate few SQL Server Myth and their resolution backing up with some demo. This demo session is a must-attend for all developers and administrators who would come to the event. This is going to be a very quick yet fun session. Session 2: Master Data Services in Microsoft SQL Server 2008 R2 Date: April 12, 2010 Time: 2:30pm-3:30pm SQL Server Master Data Services will ship with SQL Server 2008 R2 and will improve Microsoft’s platform appeal. This session provides an in depth demonstration of MDS features and highlights important usage scenarios. Master Data Services enables consistent decision making by allowing you to create, manage and propagate changes from single master view of your business entities. Also with MDS – Master Data-hub which is the vital component helps ensure reporting consistency across systems and deliver faster more accurate results across the enterprise. We will talk about establishing the basis for a centralized approach to defining, deploying, and managing master data in the enterprise. Session 3: Developing with SQL Server Spatial and Deep Dive into Spatial Indexing Date: April 14, 2010 Time: 5:00pm-6:00pm Microsoft SQL Server 2008 delivers new spatial data types that enable you to consume, use, and extend location-based data through spatial-enabled applications. Attend this session to learn how to use spatial functionality in next version of SQL Server to build and optimize spatial queries. This session outlines the new geography data type to store geodetic spatial data and perform operations on it, use the new geometry data type to store planar spatial data and perform operations on it, take advantage of new spatial indexes for high performance queries, use the new spatial results tab to quickly and easily view spatial query results directly from within Management Studio, extend spatial data capabilities by building or integrating location-enabled applications through support for spatial standards and specifications and much more. Panel Discussion: Harness the power of Web – SEO and Technical Blogging Date: April 12, 2010 Time: 5:00pm-6:00pm Here you will learn lots of tricks and tips about SEO and Technical Blogging from various Industry Technical Blogging Experts. This event will surely be one of the most important Tech conventions of 2010. TechEd is going to be a very busy time for Tech developers and enthusiasts, since every evening there will be a fun session to attend. If you are interested in any of the above topics for every session, I suggest that you visit each of them as you will learn so many things about the topic to be discussed. Reference: Pinal Dave (http://blog.SQLAuthority.com) Filed under: MVP, Pinal Dave, SQL, SQL Authority, SQL Query, SQL Server, SQL Tips and Tricks, SQLAuthority Author Visit, SQLAuthority News, T SQL, Technology Tagged: TechEd, TechEdIn

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Edit Text in a Webpage with Internet Explorer 8

- by Matthew Guay

Internet Explorer is often decried as the worst browser for web developers, but IE8 actually offers a very nice set of developer tools. Here we’ll look at a unique way to use them to edit the text on any webpage. How to edit text in a webpage IE8’s developer tools make it easy to make changes to a webpage and view them directly. Simply browse to the webpage of your choice, and press the F12 key on your keyboard. Alternately, you can click the Tools button, and select Developer tools from the list. This opens the developer tools. To do our editing, we want to select the mouse button on the toolbar “Select Element by Click” tool. Now, click on any spot of the webpage in IE8 that you want to edit. Here, let’s edit the footer of Google.com. Notice it places a blue box around any element you hover over to make it easy to choose exactly what you want to edit. In the developer tools window, the element you selected before is now highlighted. Click the plus button beside that entry if the text you want to edit is not visible. Now, click the text you wish to change, and enter what you wish in the box. For fun, we changed the copyright to say “©2010 Microsoft”. Go back to IE to see the changes on the page! You can also change a link on a page this way: Or you can even change the text on a button: Here’s our edited Google.com: This may be fun for playing a trick on someone or simply for a funny screenshot, but it can be very useful, too. You could test how changes in fontsize would change how a website looks, or see how a button would look with a different label. It can also be useful when taking screenshots. For instance, if I want to show a friend how to do something in Gmail but don’t want to reveal my email address, I could edit the text on the top right before I took the screenshot. Here I changed my Gmail address to [email protected]. Please note that the changes will disappear when you reload the page. You can save your changes from the developer tools window, though, and reopen the page from your computer if you wish. We have found this trick very helpful at times, and it can be very fun too! Enjoy it, and let us know how you used it to help you! Similar Articles Productive Geek Tips Edit Webpage Text Areas in Your Favorite Text EditorRemove Webpage Formatting or View the HTML Code When Copying in FirefoxChange the Default Editor From Nano on Ubuntu LinuxShare Text & Images the Easy Way with JustPaste.itEditPad Lite – All Purpose Tabbed Text Editor TouchFreeze Alternative in AutoHotkey The Icy Undertow Desktop Windows Home Server – Backup to LAN The Clear & Clean Desktop Use This Bookmarklet to Easily Get Albums Use AutoHotkey to Assign a Hotkey to a Specific Window Latest Software Reviews Tinyhacker Random Tips Revo Uninstaller Pro Registry Mechanic 9 for Windows PC Tools Internet Security Suite 2010 PCmover Professional Enable Check Box Selection in Windows 7 OnlineOCR – Free OCR Service Betting on the Blind Side, a Vanity Fair article 30 Minimal Logo Designs that Say More with Less LEGO Digital Designer – Free Create a Personal Website Quickly using Flavors.me

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Edit Text in a Webpage with Internet Explorer 8

- by Matthew Guay

Internet Explorer is often decried as the worst browser for web developers, but IE8 actually offers a very nice set of developer tools. Here we’ll look at a unique way to use them to edit the text on any webpage. How to edit text in a webpage IE8’s developer tools make it easy to make changes to a webpage and view them directly. Simply browse to the webpage of your choice, and press the F12 key on your keyboard. Alternately, you can click the Tools button, and select Developer tools from the list. This opens the developer tools. To do our editing, we want to select the mouse button on the toolbar “Select Element by Click” tool. Now, click on any spot of the webpage in IE8 that you want to edit. Here, let’s edit the footer of Google.com. Notice it places a blue box around any element you hover over to make it easy to choose exactly what you want to edit. In the developer tools window, the element you selected before is now highlighted. Click the plus button beside that entry if the text you want to edit is not visible. Now, click the text you wish to change, and enter what you wish in the box. For fun, we changed the copyright to say “©2010 Microsoft”. Go back to IE to see the changes on the page! You can also change a link on a page this way: Or you can even change the text on a button: Here’s our edited Google.com: This may be fun for playing a trick on someone or simply for a funny screenshot, but it can be very useful, too. You could test how changes in fontsize would change how a website looks, or see how a button would look with a different label. It can also be useful when taking screenshots. For instance, if I want to show a friend how to do something in Gmail but don’t want to reveal my email address, I could edit the text on the top right before I took the screenshot. Here I changed my Gmail address to [email protected]. Please note that the changes will disappear when you reload the page. You can save your changes from the developer tools window, though, and reopen the page from your computer if you wish. We have found this trick very helpful at times, and it can be very fun too! Enjoy it, and let us know how you used it to help you! Similar Articles Productive Geek Tips Edit Webpage Text Areas in Your Favorite Text EditorRemove Webpage Formatting or View the HTML Code When Copying in FirefoxChange the Default Editor From Nano on Ubuntu LinuxShare Text & Images the Easy Way with JustPaste.itEditPad Lite – All Purpose Tabbed Text Editor TouchFreeze Alternative in AutoHotkey The Icy Undertow Desktop Windows Home Server – Backup to LAN The Clear & Clean Desktop Use This Bookmarklet to Easily Get Albums Use AutoHotkey to Assign a Hotkey to a Specific Window Latest Software Reviews Tinyhacker Random Tips Revo Uninstaller Pro Registry Mechanic 9 for Windows PC Tools Internet Security Suite 2010 PCmover Professional Enable Check Box Selection in Windows 7 OnlineOCR – Free OCR Service Betting on the Blind Side, a Vanity Fair article 30 Minimal Logo Designs that Say More with Less LEGO Digital Designer – Free Create a Personal Website Quickly using Flavors.me

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SQL SERVER – Introduction to Wait Stats and Wait Types – Wait Type – Day 1 of 28

- by pinaldave

I have been working a lot on Wait Stats and Wait Types recently. Last Year, I requested blog readers to send me their respective server’s wait stats. I appreciate their kind response as I have received Wait stats from my readers. I took each of the results and carefully analyzed them. I provided necessary feedback to the person who sent me his wait stats and wait types. Based on the feedbacks I got, many of the readers have tuned their server. After a while I got further feedbacks on my recommendations and again, I collected wait stats. I recorded the wait stats and my recommendations and did further research. At some point at time, there were more than 10 different round trips of the recommendations and suggestions. Finally, after six month of working my hands on performance tuning, I have collected some real world wisdom because of this. Now I plan to share my findings with all of you over here. Before anything else, please note that all of these are based on my personal observations and opinions. They may or may not match the theory available at other places. Some of the suggestions may not match your situation. Remember, every server is different and consequently, there is more than one solution to a particular problem. However, this series is written with kept wait stats in mind. While I was working on various performance tuning consultations, I did many more things than just tuning wait stats. Today we will discuss how to capture the wait stats. I use the script diagnostic script created by my friend and SQL Server Expert Glenn Berry to collect wait stats. Here is the script to collect the wait stats: -- Isolate top waits for server instance since last restart or statistics clear WITH Waits AS (SELECT wait_type, wait_time_ms / 1000. AS wait_time_s, 100. * wait_time_ms / SUM(wait_time_ms) OVER() AS pct, ROW_NUMBER() OVER(ORDER BY wait_time_ms DESC) AS rn FROM sys.dm_os_wait_stats WHERE wait_type NOT IN ('CLR_SEMAPHORE','LAZYWRITER_SLEEP','RESOURCE_QUEUE','SLEEP_TASK' ,'SLEEP_SYSTEMTASK','SQLTRACE_BUFFER_FLUSH','WAITFOR', 'LOGMGR_QUEUE','CHECKPOINT_QUEUE' ,'REQUEST_FOR_DEADLOCK_SEARCH','XE_TIMER_EVENT','BROKER_TO_FLUSH','BROKER_TASK_STOP','CLR_MANUAL_EVENT' ,'CLR_AUTO_EVENT','DISPATCHER_QUEUE_SEMAPHORE', 'FT_IFTS_SCHEDULER_IDLE_WAIT' ,'XE_DISPATCHER_WAIT', 'XE_DISPATCHER_JOIN', 'SQLTRACE_INCREMENTAL_FLUSH_SLEEP')) SELECT W1.wait_type, CAST(W1.wait_time_s AS DECIMAL(12, 2)) AS wait_time_s, CAST(W1.pct AS DECIMAL(12, 2)) AS pct, CAST(SUM(W2.pct) AS DECIMAL(12, 2)) AS running_pct FROM Waits AS W1 INNER JOIN Waits AS W2 ON W2.rn <= W1.rn GROUP BY W1.rn, W1.wait_type, W1.wait_time_s, W1.pct HAVING SUM(W2.pct) - W1.pct < 99 OPTION (RECOMPILE); -- percentage threshold GO This script uses Dynamic Management View sys.dm_os_wait_stats to collect the wait stats. It omits the system-related wait stats which are not useful to diagnose performance-related bottleneck. Additionally, not OPTION (RECOMPILE) at the end of the DMV will ensure that every time the query runs, it retrieves new data and not the cached data. This dynamic management view collects all the information since the time when the SQL Server services have been restarted. You can also manually clear the wait stats using the following command: DBCC SQLPERF('sys.dm_os_wait_stats', CLEAR); Once the wait stats are collected, we can start analysis them and try to see what is causing any particular wait stats to achieve higher percentages than the others. Many waits stats are related to one another. When the CPU pressure is high, all the CPU-related wait stats show up on top. But when that is fixed, all the wait stats related to the CPU start showing reasonable percentages. It is difficult to have a sure solution, but there are good indications and good suggestions on how to solve this. I will keep this blog post updated as I will post more details about wait stats and how I reduce them. The reference to Book On Line is over here. Of course, I have selected February to run this Wait Stats series. I am already cheating by having the smallest month to run this series. :) Reference: Pinal Dave (http://blog.SQLAuthority.com) Filed under: DMV, Pinal Dave, PostADay, SQL, SQL Authority, SQL Optimization, SQL Performance, SQL Query, SQL Scripts, SQL Server, SQL Tips and Tricks, SQL Wait Stats, SQL Wait Types, T SQL, Technology

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Create a Customized Tab on the Office 2010 Ribbon

- by Mysticgeek

Some MS Office users were put off a bit by the Ribbon feature in 2007 for being cumbersome and confusing. Today we look at a cool new feature in Office 2010 that allows you to create your own custom tabs with specific commands for easier document creation. Create a Customized Tab In our example we’re using Word, but you can create a custom tab in the other Office apps as well. To do so, right-click on the Ribbon and select Customize the Ribbon. The Word Options screen opens up and from here you can manage a lot of customization options. We want to create a new customized tab, so click on the New Tab button. Now give it a name… Now just drag the commands you want to add from the left column over to your new custom group. You have every command available to choose from. You can select specific groups or all commands from the dropdown menu on the left. That is all there is to it…now you have your own customized tab with the commands you use most often to help you work more efficiently. In this example We didn’t add a whole lot of commands, but you can customize it with as many as you need. You can also create other tabs with different sets of commands too. When you create a customized tab in one application, it’s only going to be in that app. For example if you create on in Word, it’s not going to show in Excel as commands differ between apps. If you want a custom tab in another Office app you’ll need to create one for it. Another very cool thing you can do is export the customizations to use on another machine or pass them to a coworker. To export the customizations, go to the Customize Ribbon section and at the bottom of the right field click Import/Export then Export all customizations. Then save the file to a location on your hard drive. To import the settings to another machine, go into Ribbon Customizations and select Import customizations file… then browse the the file you exported. You’ll be prompted to confirm you want to import he customizations… After confirming the choice now you’ll see the customization show up on the other machine. This is very handy if you work on several machines throughout the day and want to easily bring your customized tabs with you. If you find yourself using a lot of specific commands throughout the day, creating your own customized tab will help access them more quickly. If you want to test out Office 2010 it’s currently in Public Beta and can be downloaded for free. Download Office 2010 Beta Similar Articles Productive Geek Tips Maximize Space by "Auto-Hiding" the Ribbon in Office 2007Make Learning Office 2007 & 2010 Fun with Ribbon HeroAdd or Remove Apps from the Microsoft Office 2007 or 2010 SuiteHow To Bring Back the Old Menus in Office 2007How To Take Screenshots with Word 2010 TouchFreeze Alternative in AutoHotkey The Icy Undertow Desktop Windows Home Server – Backup to LAN The Clear & Clean Desktop Use This Bookmarklet to Easily Get Albums Use AutoHotkey to Assign a Hotkey to a Specific Window Latest Software Reviews Tinyhacker Random Tips Revo Uninstaller Pro Registry Mechanic 9 for Windows PC Tools Internet Security Suite 2010 PCmover Professional Enable Check Box Selection in Windows 7 OnlineOCR – Free OCR Service Betting on the Blind Side, a Vanity Fair article 30 Minimal Logo Designs that Say More with Less LEGO Digital Designer – Free Create a Personal Website Quickly using Flavors.me

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Create a Customized Tab on the Office 2010 Ribbon

- by Mysticgeek

Some MS Office users were put off a bit by the Ribbon feature in 2007 for being cumbersome and confusing. Today we look at a cool new feature in Office 2010 that allows you to create your own custom tabs with specific commands for easier document creation. Create a Customized Tab In our example we’re using Word, but you can create a custom tab in the other Office apps as well. To do so, right-click on the Ribbon and select Customize the Ribbon. The Word Options screen opens up and from here you can manage a lot of customization options. We want to create a new customized tab, so click on the New Tab button. Now give it a name… Now just drag the commands you want to add from the left column over to your new custom group. You have every command available to choose from. You can select specific groups or all commands from the dropdown menu on the left. That is all there is to it…now you have your own customized tab with the commands you use most often to help you work more efficiently. In this example We didn’t add a whole lot of commands, but you can customize it with as many as you need. You can also create other tabs with different sets of commands too. When you create a customized tab in one application, it’s only going to be in that app. For example if you create on in Word, it’s not going to show in Excel as commands differ between apps. If you want a custom tab in another Office app you’ll need to create one for it. Another very cool thing you can do is export the customizations to use on another machine or pass them to a coworker. To export the customizations, go to the Customize Ribbon section and at the bottom of the right field click Import/Export then Export all customizations. Then save the file to a location on your hard drive. To import the settings to another machine, go into Ribbon Customizations and select Import customizations file… then browse the the file you exported. You’ll be prompted to confirm you want to import he customizations… After confirming the choice now you’ll see the customization show up on the other machine. This is very handy if you work on several machines throughout the day and want to easily bring your customized tabs with you. If you find yourself using a lot of specific commands throughout the day, creating your own customized tab will help access them more quickly. If you want to test out Office 2010 it’s currently in Public Beta and can be downloaded for free. Download Office 2010 Beta Similar Articles Productive Geek Tips Maximize Space by "Auto-Hiding" the Ribbon in Office 2007Make Learning Office 2007 & 2010 Fun with Ribbon HeroAdd or Remove Apps from the Microsoft Office 2007 or 2010 SuiteHow To Bring Back the Old Menus in Office 2007How To Take Screenshots with Word 2010 TouchFreeze Alternative in AutoHotkey The Icy Undertow Desktop Windows Home Server – Backup to LAN The Clear & Clean Desktop Use This Bookmarklet to Easily Get Albums Use AutoHotkey to Assign a Hotkey to a Specific Window Latest Software Reviews Tinyhacker Random Tips Revo Uninstaller Pro Registry Mechanic 9 for Windows PC Tools Internet Security Suite 2010 PCmover Professional Enable Check Box Selection in Windows 7 OnlineOCR – Free OCR Service Betting on the Blind Side, a Vanity Fair article 30 Minimal Logo Designs that Say More with Less LEGO Digital Designer – Free Create a Personal Website Quickly using Flavors.me

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Developer’s Life – Every Developer is a Batman

- by Pinal Dave

Batman is one of the darkest superheroes in the fantasy canon. He does not come to his powers through any sort of magical coincidence or radioactive insect, but through a lot of psychological scarring caused by witnessing the death of his parents. Despite his dark back story, he possesses a lot of admirable abilities that I feel bear comparison to developers. Batman has the distinct advantage that his alter ego, Bruce Wayne is a millionaire (or billionaire in today’s reboots). This means that he can spend his time working on his athletic abilities, building a secret lair, and investing his money in cool tools. This might not be true for developers (well, most developers), but I still think there are many parallels. So how are developers like Batman? Well, read on my list of reasons. Develop Skills Batman works on his skills. He didn’t get the strength to scale Gotham’s skyscrapers by inheriting his powers or suffering an industrial accident. Developers also hone their skills daily. They might not be doing pull-ups and scaling buldings, but I think their skills are just as impressive. Clear Goals Batman is driven to build a better Gotham. He knows that the criminal who killed his parents was a small-time thief, not a super villain – so he has larger goals in mind than simply chasing one villain. He wants his city as a whole to be better. Developers are also driven to make things better. It can be easy to get hung up on one problem, but in the end it is best to focus on the well-being of the system as a whole. Ultimate Teamplayers Batman is the hero Gotham needs – even when that means appearing to be the bad guys. Developers probably know that feeling well. Batman takes the fall for a crime he didn’t commit, and developers often have to deliver bad news about the limitations of their networks and servers. It’s not always a job filled with glory and thanks, but someone has to do it. Always Ready Batman and the Boy Scouts have this in common – they are always prepared. Let’s add developers to this list. Batman has an amazing tool belt with gadgets and gizmos, and let’s not even get into all the functions of the Batmobile! Developers’ skills might be the knowledge and skills they have developed, not tools they can carry in a utility belt, but that doesn’t make them any less impressive. 100% Dedication Bruce Wayne cultivates the personality of a playboy, never keeping the same girlfriend for long and spending his time partying. Even though he hides it, his driving force is his deep concern and love for his friends and the city as a whole. Developers also care a lot about their company and employees – even when it is driving them crazy. You do your best work when you care about your job on a personal level. Quality Output Batman believes the city deserves to be saved. The citizens might have a love-hate relationship with both Batman and Bruce Wayne, and employees might not always appreciate developers. Batman and developers, though, keep working for the best of everyone. I hope you are all enjoying reading about developers-as-superheroes as much as I am enjoying writing about them. Please tell me how else developers are like Superheroes in the comments – especially if you know any developers who are faster than a speeding bullet and can leap tall buildings in a single bound. Reference: Pinal Dave (http://blog.sqlauthority.com)Filed under: PostADay, SQL, SQL Authority, SQL Query, SQL Server, SQL Tips and Tricks, T SQL Tagged: Developer, Superhero

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How to prepare for a telephone interview: ‘Develop an Interview Cheat Sheet’

- by Maria Sandu

At Oracle we often do telephone interviews in different stages of the process with candidates, due to the fact that we hire native speakers into other countries. On this blog we already have an article with tips and tricks for phone interviews that can help you during the telephone interviews. To help you prepare even better for a telephone interview we would like to introduce you the basics of developing a cheat sheet. The benefit of a telephone interview is that you will be sitting at home, at your table or desk, during the interview, and not in front of someone. So use this to your advantage. The Monster website has some useful and interesting tips and tricks for developing a cheat sheet. Carole Martin, who wrote this article, says that a cheat sheet will help you feel more prepared and confident when speaking to managers over the phone. Important to keep in mind is that you shouldn't memorise what's on the sheet or check it off during the interview. Only use your cheat sheet to remind you of key facts. Here are some suggestions to include on it: • Divide a piece of paper in 2 by drawing a line. Write on one side of the paper a list of requirements as mentioned in the job description. On the other side list your qualities to fulfill the requirements of the employer. This will help you in answering questions about why you are the best candidate for the job and how you fit the role. • Do research on the company, the industry sector and the competitors, so you will get a feeling for the company’s business and can ask more in-depth questions. • Be prepared for the most used introduction question: “Tell me a bit about yourself”. Prepare a 60-second personal statement or pitch in which you summarise who you are and what you can offer, so you will be able to sell yourself from on the very beginning. • Write down a minimum of 5 good examples to answer behavioral interview questions ("Tell me about a time when..." or "Give me an example of a time..." ). These questions are used by interviewers to see how you deal with similar situations as you might encounter in the job. Interviewers use this question as past behaviour is scientifically proven to be the best predictor for future behaviour. • List five questions to ask the interviewer about the job, the company and the industry to help you get a good understanding if the role and company really fit your needs and wants. To get some inspiration check this article on inc.com • Find out how much you are worth on the job market and determine your needs based on your living expenses, especially when moving abroad. • Ask for permission from the people you plan to use as a reference. Also make sure you have your CV at hand and an overview of your grades. Feel free to comment on this article and let us know what your experience is with developing a cheat sheet for a telephone interview. Good luck with the preparation of your sheet.

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Performance and Optimization Isn’t Evil

- by Reed

Donald Knuth is a fairly amazing guy. I consider him one of the most influential contributors to computer science of all time. Unfortunately, most of the time I hear his name, I cringe. This is because it’s typically somebody quoting a small portion of one of his famous statements on optimization: “premature optimization is the root of all evil.” I mention that this is only a portion of the entire quote, and, as such, I feel that Knuth is being quoted out of context. Optimization is important. It is a critical part of every software development effort, and should never be ignored. A developer who ignores optimization is not a professional. Every developer should understand optimization – know what to optimize, when to optimize it, and how to think about code in a way that is intelligent and productive from day one. I want to start by discussing my own, personal motivation here. I recently wrote about a performance issue I ran across, and was slammed by multiple comments and emails that effectively boiled down to: “You’re an idiot. Premature optimization is the root of all evil. This doesn’t matter.” It didn’t matter that I discovered this while measuring in a profiler, and that it was a portion of my code base that can take “many hours to complete.” Even so, multiple people instantly jump to “it’s premature – it doesn’t matter.” This is a common thread I see. For example, StackOverflow has many pages of posts with answers that boil down to (mis)quoting Knuth. In fact, just about any question relating to a performance related issue gets this quote thrown at it immediately – whether it deserves it or not. That being said, I did receive some positive comments and emails as well. Many people want to understand how to optimize their code, approaches to take, tools and techniques they can use, and any other advice they can discover. First, lets get back to Knuth – I mentioned before that Knuth is being quoted out of context. Lets start by looking at the entire quote from his 1974 paper Structured Programming with go to Statements: “We should forget about small efficiencies, say about 97% of the time: premature optimization is the root of all evil. Yet we should not pass up our opportunities in that critical 3%. A good programmer will not be lulled into complacency by such reasoning, he will be wise to look carefully at the critical code; but only after that code has been identified.” Ironically, if you read Knuth’s original paper, this statement was made in the middle of a discussion of how Knuth himself had changed how he approaches optimization. It was never a statement saying “don’t optimize”, but rather, “optimizing intelligently provides huge advantages.” His approach had three benefits: “a) it doesn’t take long” … “b) the payoff is real”, c) you can “be less efficient in the other parts of my programs, which therefore are more readable and more easily written and debugged.” Looking at Knuth’s premise here, and reading that section of his paper, really leads to a few observations: Optimization is important “he will be wise to look carefully at the critical code” Normally, 3% of your code – three lines out of every 100 you write, are “critical code” and will require some optimization: “we should not pass up our opportunities in that critical 3%” Optimization, if done well, should not be time consuming: “it doesn’t take long” Optimization, if done correctly, provides real benefits: “the payoff is real” None of this is new information. People who care about optimization have been discussing this for years – for example, Rico Mariani’s Designing For Performance (a fantastic article) discusses many of the same issues very intelligently. That being said, many developers seem unable or unwilling to consider optimization. Many others don’t seem to know where to start. As such, I’m going to spend some time writing about optimization – what is it, how should we think about it, and what can we do to improve our own code.

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Required Skill Sets Of A Software Architect

The question has been asked as to what is the required skill sets of a software architect. The answer to this is that it truly depends. When I state that it depend, it depends on the organization, industry, and skill sets available on the open market and internally within a company. With open ended skill sets even Napoleon Dynamite could be an architect. Napoleon Dynamite’s Skills Pedro: Have you asked anybody yet? Napoleon Dynamite: No, but who would? I don't even have any good skills. Pedro: What do you mean? Napoleon Dynamite: You know, like nunchuck skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills... Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills. Pedro: Aren't you pretty good at drawing, like animals and warriors and stuff? This example might be a little off base but it does illustrate a point. What are the real required skills of a software architect? In my opinion, an architect needs to demonstrate the knowledge of the following three main skill set categories so that they are successful. General Skill Sets of an Architect Basic Engineering Skills Organizational Skills Interpersonal Skills Basic Engineering Skills are a very large part of what a software architect deal with on a daily bases when designing or updating systems. Think about it, how good would a lead mechanic be if they did not know how to fix or repair cars? They would not be, and that is my point that architects need to have at least some basic skills regarding engineering. The skills listed below are generic in nature because they change from job to job, so in this discussion I am trying to focus more on generalities so that anyone can apply this information to their individual situation. Common Basic Engineering Skills Data Modeling Code Creation Configuration Testing Deployment/Publishing System and Environment Knowledge Organizational Skills If an Architect works for or with an origination then they will need strong organization skills to survive. An architect is no use to a project if the project is missed managed. Additionally, budgets and timelines can really affect a company and their products when established deadlines are repeated not meet. By not meeting these timelines a company is forced to cancel the project and waste all the money and time spent or spend more money until it is completed, if it is ever completed. Common Organizational Skills Project Management Estimation (Cost and Time) Creation and Maintenance of Accepted Standards Interpersonal Skills For me personally Interpersonal skill ranks above the other types of skill sets because an architect can quickly pick up the other two skill sets by communicating with other team/project members so that they are quickly up to speed on a project. Additionally, in order for an architect to manage a project or even derive rough estimates they will more than likely have to consult with others actually working on the code (Programmers/Software Engineers) to get there estimates since they will be the ones actually working on the changes to be implemented. Common Interpersonal Skills Good Communicator Focus on projects success over personal Honors roles within a team Reference: Taylor, R. N., Medvidovic, N., & Dashofy, E. M. (2009). Software architecture: Foundations, theory, and practice Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons

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Surface Review from Canadian Guy Who Didn’t Go To Build

- by D'Arcy Lussier

I didn’t go to Build last week, opted to stay home and go trick-or-treating with my daughters instead. I had many friends that did go however, and I was able to catch up with James Chambers last night to hear about the conference and play with his Surface RT and Nokia 920 WP8 devices. I’ve been using Windows 8 for a while now, so I’m not going to comment on OS features – lots of posts out there on that already. Let me instead comment on the hardware itself. Size and Weight The size of the tablet was awesome. The Windows 8 tablet I’m using to reference this against is the one from Build 2011 (Samsung model) we received as well as my iPad. The Surface RT was taller and slightly heavier than the iPad, but smaller and lighter than the Samsung Win 8 tablet. I still don’t prefer the default wide-screen format, but the Surface RT is much more usable even when holding it by the long edge than the Samsung. Build Quality No issues with the build quality, it seemed very solid. But…y’know, people have been going on about how the Surface RT materials are so much better than the plastic feeling models Samsung and others put out. I didn’t really notice *that* much difference in that regard with the Surface RT. Interesting feature I didn’t expect – the Windows button on the device is touch-sensitive, not a mechanical one. I didn’t try video or anything, so I can’t comment on the media experience. The kickstand is a great feature, and the way the Surface RT connects to the combo case/keyboard touchcover is very slick while being incredibly simple. What About That Touch Cover Keyboard? So first, kudos to Microsoft on the touch cover! This thing was insanely responsive (including the trackpad) and really delivered on the thinness I was expecting. With that said, and remember this is with very limited use, I would probably go with the Type Cover instead of the Touch Cover. The difference is buttons. The Touch Cover doesn’t actually have “buttons” on the keyboard – hence why its a “touch” cover. You tap on a key to type it. James tells me after a while you get used to it and you can type very fast. For me, I just prefer the tactile feeling of a button being pressed/depressed. But still – typing on the touch case worked very well. Would I Buy One? So after playing with it, did I cry out in envy and rage that I wasn’t able to get one of these machines? Did I curse my decision to collect Halloween candy with my kids instead of being at Build getting hardware? Well – no. Even with the keyboard, the Surface RT is not a business laptop replacement device. While Office does come included, you can’t install any other applications outside of Windows Store Apps. This might be limiting depending on what other applications you need to have available on your computer. Surface RT is a great personal computing device, as long as you’re not already invested in a competing ecosystem. I’ve heard people make statements that they’re going to replace all the iPads in their homes with Surface tablets. In my home, that’s not feasible – my wife and daughters have amassed quite a collection of games via iTunes. We also buy all our music via iTunes as well, so even with the XBox streaming music service now available we’re still tied quite tightly to iTunes. So who is the Surface RT for? In my mind, if you’re looking for a solid, compact device that provides basic business functionality (read: email) or if you have someone that needs a very simple to use computer for email, web browsing, etc., then Surface RT is a great option. For me, I’m waiting on the Samsung Ativ Smart PC Pro and am curious to see what changes the Surface Pro will come with.

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You Might Be a DBA

- by BuckWoody

With all apologies to Jeff Foxworthy, I was up late Friday night on a holiday weekend (which translated into T-SQL becomes “Maintenance Window”) and I got bored in between the two or three minutes I had between clicks. So I started a “Twitter” meme – and it just took off. I haven’t cleaned these up much, but here, in author order as of Saturday the 29th of May is the list “You might be a DBA” from around the Twitterverse: buckwoody Your two main enemies are developers and SAN admins #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody People can use Access as a cross or garlic on you #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You always plan an exit strategy, even when entering a McDonald's #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You can't explain to your family what you really do for a living #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have at least one set of scripts you won't share #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have an opinion on the best code-beautifier #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have children older than the rest of your team #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You and the Oracle DBA would kill each other, but you'll happily fight off a developer together first #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've threatened to quit if they give anyone the sa password on production #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've sent a vendor suggestions on improving their database design or code (and been ignored) #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've sent a vendor suggestions on improving their database design or code (and been ignored) #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have an opinion on the best code-beautifier #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have at least one set of scripts you won't share #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You refer to co-workers as "carbon-units" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Being paranoid is on your resume at the top #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Everyone comes to your cube to find the MSDN DVD's #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You always plan an exit strategy, even when entering a McDonald's #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've worn down developers to get your way by explaining normalization levels #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You refer to clothes as "Data Abstractions" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Users pester you to be able to put data in a database, then they pester you to take it out and put it in Excel #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Others try to de-duplicate data, you try to copy it to more than three locations #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have at least one DLT tape in the trunk of your car #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You use twitter and facebook to talk with colleagues because there's no one else in your company that does what you do #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Your spouse knows what "ETL" means #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've referred to yourself as the "Data Janitor" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You don't have positive connotations of the word "upgrade" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You get your coffee before you check your servers, because you know you won't get any if you don't #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You always come to work through the back door so no one hijacks you on the way to your cube #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You check your server logs before you check your e-mail in the morning so you can reply "Yeah, I already fixed that." #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have more conference badges than clean socks #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Your coffee mug says "It depends" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You can convince a boss that you need 16GB of RAM in your laptop #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've used ebay to find production equipment #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You pad all project timelines by 2X, and you still miss them #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You know when your company is acquiring another even before the CFO #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You pad all project timelines by 2X, and you still miss them #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You call aspirin "work vitamins" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You get the same amount of sleep even after you have a child #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You obsess about performance metrics from over one year ago #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody The first thing you buy after the database software is aftermarket tools to manage the database software #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've tried to convince someone else to become a DBA #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You use twitter and facebook to talk with colleagues because there's no one else in your company that does what you do #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You only know other DBA's by their Tweet Handle #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've explained the difference between 32 and 64-bit to more than one manager in terms they can understand, using puppets #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Your two main enemies are developers and SAN admins #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've driven to the Datacenter to install SQL Server because "you don't trust those NOC admins" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You pay more for faster Internet connections than cable at home so you don't have to drive in #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You call texting a "queuing system" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You know that if someone can read Perl, they manage an Oracle system #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have an e-mail rule for backup notifications #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Your food pyramid includes coffee, salt and fat #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You wish everything had a graphical query plan #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You refactor your e-mails #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've gotten more help from twitter and facebook than all your years in college #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You would pay money for a license plate that has the letters S-Q-L together #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have actually considered making a RAID array from thumb drives #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Everything on your laptop is installed from your MSDN subscription #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've written blog posts on technology you've never actually implemented in production #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Everything on your laptop is installed from your MSDN subscription #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody @MidnightDBA Click the #youmightbeaDBA tag. I've had WAY too much coffee today. buckwoody There is no other position that is 1-deep except you and the CEO #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody When you watch "The Office" you call it "OJT" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You would pay money for a license plate that has the letters S-Q-L together #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Your blog would make a "best practices" or "worst practices" book #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You have actually considered making a RAID array from thumb drives #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody The first thing you install on your netbook is SSMS #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Everything on your laptop is installed from your MSDN subscription #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Your watch is set to UTC because it's just easier #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You make plenty of money, but you're excited to get a $2.00 squeeze-ball from Quest and Redgate #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You make plenty of money, but you're excited to get a $2.00 squeeze-ball from Quest and Redgate #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You think data can be represented as something OTHER than XML #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You tell people that you made a database query go faster, and expect them to be happy for you #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You take the word "NoSQL" as a personal attack #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody People can use Access as a cross or garlic on you #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody * == bad #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody * == bad #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody There are just as many females in your technical field as males #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody People can use Access as a cross or garlic on you #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've gotten more help from twitter and facebook than all your years in college #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You think that something OTHER than the database might be the performance bottleneck #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You refer to time as a "Clustered Index" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You know why "user" refers to both business people and crack addicts #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You make plenty of money, but you're excited to get a $2.00 squeeze-ball from Quest and Redgate #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You can't explain to your family what you really do for a living #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You tell people that you made a database query go faster, and expect them to be happy for you #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You think a millisecond is a really long time #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You're sitting and typing #youmightbeaDBA when you could be outside #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You can't wait for a technical conference so you can wear a kilt - and you're not Scottish #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You know that "DBA" stands for "Default Blame Acceptor" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody People can use Access as a cross or garlic on you #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You know what "the truth, thole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me Codd" means #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've gotten more help from twitter and facebook than all your years in college #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You can't talk fast enough to get a concept out of your head so you tweet it instead #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You cry when someone doesn't use a WHERE clause #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You think data can be represented as something OTHER than XML #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You think "Set theory" is not an verb but a noun #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You try to convince random strangers to vote on your Connect item #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You think 3 hours of contiguous sleep is a good thing #youmightbeaDBA or #youmightbeamother buckwoody You don't like Oracle, and not just because of what she did to Neo #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You know when to say "sequel" and "s-q-l" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You know where the data is #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You refer to your children as "Fully Redundant Mirrors" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Holiday == "Maintenance Window" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Your laptop is more powerful than the servers in most companies - including your own #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You capitalize SELECTed words #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You take the word "NoSQL" as a personal attack #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You know why "user" refers to both business people and crack addicts #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You cringe in public when the word "upgrade" is used in a sentence #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Holiday == "Maintenance Window" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody All Data Is MetaData means something to you #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You've never seen the driveway to your house in the daylight #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You think that something OTHER than the database might be the performance bottleneck #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Most of your bloodstream is composed of caffeine #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody Your task list is labeled "CRUD Matrix" #youmightbeaDBA buckwoody You call your wife/husband a "Linked Server" #youmightbeaDBA anonythemouse When someone tells you they are going to take a dump and you wonder of which database then #youmightbeaDBA anonythemouse When it's 11pm on a holiday weekend and you are working #youmightbeaDBA anonythemouse When you sit down at a table and look for it's primary key #youmightbeaDBA anonythemouse When getting milk from the fridge you check the expiry date is > getdate() #youmightbeaDBA blakmk when you wake up dreaming about sql #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver You think a @buckwoody bobblehead would be a cool thing to have on the dashboard of your car #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver Your friends don't understand why you think there's a difference between single and double quotes #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver Even the newest employees know your name from all the downtime notices you've sent out #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver You sometimes feel anxious and think "I should test restoring those backups" and then the feeling passes #youmightbeadba CharlesGarver You know what a co-worker means when they ask "how is your squirrel server?" #youmightbeadba CharlesGarver You can't sleep at night and you ponder the logisitcs of collecting every copy of Access for the world's biggest bonfire #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver You can't sleep at night and you ponder the logisitcs of collecting every copy of Access for the world's biggest bonfire #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver You're willing to move someone's job up in priority for a box of #voodoodonuts #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver Each person in your company seems to think you work for THEM #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver You have a Love/Hate relationship going on with #Microsoft #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver People ask you to troubleshoot their Access program #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver The first words you hear in the morning are 'your voicemail box is full' #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver The thought of disrupting 500 people's work so you can do something doesn't phase you #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver You can't sleep at night and you ponder the logisitcs of collecting every copy of Access for the world's biggest bonfire #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver Your home computer is backed up in 3 different places #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver Your wardrobe for work includes pajamas #youmightbeaDBA CharlesGarver Someone tells you to look in the INDEX and you look puzzled before finally going to the back of the book. #youmightbeaDBA chuckboycejr If you have ever set up a SQLAgent job to email your mobile phone to serve as an alarm clock #youmightbeaDBA chuckboycejr If you'd rather meet Itzik than Jay Z #youmightbeaDBA chuckboycejr If you'd rather meet Itzik than Jay Z #youmightbeaDBA chuckboycejr If you'd wrestle a SysAdmin to the ground to implement #DPA best practices as per @aspiringgeek #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy I need to be up in 7 hours, so I'm off to bed! I'll have to read the rest of @buckwoody's #youmightbeaDBA posts in the AM. (g'night Buck!) databaseguy When people ask you about your house, the first thing you describe is the network. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy The last thing you say at the office each day is, "is anybody else here? I'm shutting off the lights!" #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy Your blood pressure rises when you read application specs drafted by marketing. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy A good day at work is one when nobody pays you no mind. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You care about latches and wait states. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You have worked over 200 hours on a performance tuning project that required no application changes at all. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy The late-night security guard knows the names of your spouse and kids. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You have had vigorous debates about whether it should be pronounced "sequel" or "ess-queue-ell". #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You have VPN and RDP software installed on your phone ... just in case. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You have edited a data file by hand, just to see what would happen. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You decorate your office walls with database catalog posters. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You've built programs that access data just to keep other developers from asking you to run queries all the time. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy When you watch movies like The Matrix, you find yourself calculating the fasibility of storing all that data. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You have tried to convince someone to spend money on an SSD storage array. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy When CPU is spiked on a server, you want to gather forensic evidence. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You have to remind developers not to push code to production without checking if the database is ready. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy Nobody cares what you wear to work, as long as the thing keeps running. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy Telepathy is a job requirement when working with app dev teams. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You read database statistics for the educational value. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy And your boss freely admits this to anyone within earshot. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy Your boss cannot explain or understand what you do. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You envision ERDs when you see a GUI. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You say things like "applications come and go, but data lasts forever." #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You have memorized the names of several of the AdventureWorks employees. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You know what MAXDOP setting you can get away with for a big query based on current server load. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy And you immediately recognize the recursion in my last tweet. #youmightbeaDBA databaseguy You find 50 simultaneous tweets from @buckwoody about #youmightbeaDBA :O) DBAishness You have "funny stories" about the times your developers accidentally deleted the T-log in their test environment. #youmightbeaDBA DBAishness Planning to slice and dice your MDW data with PowerPivot makes you giggle like a schoolgirl. #youmightbeaDBA donalddotfarmer You think @buckwoody lives in the "real world." #youmightbeaDBA jamach09 @buckwoody #youmightbeaDBA Why go outside when you can sit in the nice cool server room? jamach09 If you refer to procreation as "Replication", #youmightbeaDBA. jamach09 If you think ORM is a four-letter word, #youmightbeaDBA JamesMarsh If you have ever preached the value of Source Code Control, #YouMightBeADBA jethrocarr @venzann You store your shopping list in a ACID compliant DB #youmightbeaDBA joe_positive @buckwoody thought it stood for "Don't Bother Asking" #youmightbeaDBA joe_positive when you check your IT Events Calendar before making weekend plans #youmightbeaDBA LadyRuna You cringe whenever someone calls Excel a database #youmightbeaDBA LadyRuna When the waiter says he'll be your server today, you ask how many terabytes he is #youmightbeaDBA LadyRuna you always call the asterisk a "Star" #youmightbeaDBA LadyRuna You walk into a server room, say "Nice RACK!" and everyone there knows you're talking about server rack... #youmightbeaDBA LadyRuna You receive more messages from servers than from friends #youmightbeaDBA LadyRuna hmmm... #youmightbeaDBA if your recipe for gumbo is "SELECT * FROM Refrigerator" markjholmes @SQLSoldier Heh. #youmightbeaDBA if you correct other DBAs' spelling of @PaulRandal markjholmes #youmightbeaDBA if you actually test RAID5 vs RAID10 on your SAN because when it comes to configuration, "it depends." markjholmes #youmightbeaDBA if you have at least 3 definitions of the word "cluster" MarlonRibunal 3 Words: @BrentO, snicker, & Access #youmightbeaDBA MarlonRibunal @onpnt @mikeSQL my appeal was a couple of mins late. Enjoying #youmightbeaDBA MarlonRibunal @mikeSQL @onpnt pls, don't mention bacon #youmightbeaDBA merv @buckwoody You HATE 3-way joins #youmightbeaDBA MidnightDBA If you're up at midnight Tweeting about SQL #youmightbeaDBA MidnightDBA @buckwoody I'd noticed that. :) #youmightbeaDBA mikeSQL when people talk about "their type" you're thinking varchar, bigint, binary, etc #youmightbeadba mikeSQL people ask you to go to lunch , but you can't go because you're attending #SQLlunch #youmightbeadba mikeSQL you laugh for hours at all of the #sqlmoviequotes ....things in which a normal individual would scratch their head at. #youmightbeadba mikeSQL you laugh for hours at all of the #sqlmoviequotes ....things in which a normal individual would scratch their head at. #youmightbeadba mrdenny If you think that @buckwoody's demo using PowerPivot to analyze index usage data from DMVs is awesome then #youmightbeaDBA mrdenny You wish @PaulRandal still worked at Microsoft so that they would make a bobble head of him #youmightbeadba mrdenny When it's 11pm on a holiday weekend, and your posting stupid jokes on Twitter then #youmightbeadba mrdenny If you go out with friends and wonder why no one's wearing a kilt then #YouMightBeADBA mrdenny You can't do basic math, but you know off the top of your head how many CALs $14,412 can buy you. #YoumightbeaDBA mrdenny If you've ever setup a SQL Job to email you to get you out of a regularly scheduled meeting #YouMightBeADBA. mrdenny You throw up in your mouth a little when ever you here the word "Access". Even if it doesn't relate to a MS product. #YouMightBeADBA msdtjones You spend more time listening to @buckwoody than your wife #youmightbeaDBA NFDotCom You perform "hail deltas" on a regular basis. #YouMightBeADBA NoelMcKinney If you tell your wife you want to go to Columbus Ohio for your wedding anniversary so you can attend #sqlsat42 then #youmightbeaDBA NoelMcKinney You read a union is on strike and wonder if it's a UNION ALL #youmightbeaDBA NoelMcKinney You read a union is on strike and wonder if it's a UNION ALL #youmightbeaDBA NoelMcKinney Someone asks you to throw another log on the fire and you tell them not to worry about it because Autogrowth is turned on #youmightbeaDBA Nuurdygirl Even if you have a girlfriend...its possible #youmightbeadba. Yeah-i said its possible! Nuurdygirl When your girlfriend has to lean around the laptop to kiss you goodnight #youmightbeadba Old_Man_Fish If you worry about how big your package is and how long it takes to finish #youmightbeaDBA Old_Man_Fish If you no longer wonder if someone is in trouble or died if you are getting calls at 2AM #youmightbeaDBA Old_Man_Fish If, when you hear the word ACCESS with no connotation you blood pressure jumps 50 points, #youmightbeaDBA onpnt When you hear the word inject you immediately get concerned if your databases are OK #youmightbeaDBA onpnt Your servers haven't been rebooted in a year #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You know why it's funny when @PaulRandal has the word, "Sheep" in a tweet #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You have read BOL without actually having a problem to figure out #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You can type "SELECT columns FROM tables" without typos but tipen ni Banglish ares a messis #youmightbeaDBA onpnt DR strategies doesn't include the word, RAID in them #youmightbeaDBA onpnt you can move a SQL Server instance to a new server without the users ever knowing #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You have made an SSIS package that is more than one step #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You have the balls to say no to your boss when they ask for the sa password #youmightbeaDBA onpnt you google to trouble shoot a problem and end up at your own blog (and it fixes it) #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You talk your wife into moving the family vacation a week earlier so you can attend the areas local SSUG meeting #youmightbeaDBA onpnt you can explain to a nontechnical person what a deadlock is #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You hope a girl asks you what your collation is #youmightbeaDBA onpnt you make jokes that include the words shrink, truncate and 1205. And you are the only one that laughs at them #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You rate your ability to stay awake to work longer on blogs, twitter, forums and your day to day job with the 5 9's goal #youmightbeaDBA onpnt you have major surgery and beg the doctor to release you back to work 5 days later because you miss your servers #youmightbeaDBA #TrueStory onpnt You do have backups and you know how to use them #youmightbeaDBA onpnt It's the network #youmightbeaDBA onpnt When the developers get to work your mood changes rapidly #youmightbeaDBA onpnt When someone says, "PASS", you first think of karaoke #youmightbeaDBA onpnt Recruiters try to get you to call them *just* because they think you'll give them @BrentO contact info #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You chuckle every time you go to grab the "CLR" Calcium, Lime and Rust Remover to clean something #youmightbeaDBA onpnt @MarlonRibunal @mikeSQL Sorry man, it was already in motion ;-) #youmightbeaDBA onpnt When you have an "I love bacon" sticker on your laptop. #youmightbeaDBA http://twitpic.com/1ry671 onpnt You sing SELECT statements in the shower #youmightbeaDBA onpnt When you see a chicken it doesn't remind you of food. It reminds you of a guy named Jorge #youmightbeaDBA onpnt At time, SQL is your mistress #youmightbeaDBA onpnt Your wife wonders if SQL is the code name of your mistress at times #youmightbeaDBA onpnt it's Friday and you are on twitter thinking really hard about what would be funny for hash tag #youmightbeaDBA onpnt You organize your wife's "decorative"pillows on the bed in a B-Tree structure #youmightbeaDBA PaulWhiteNZ If you: SELECT TOP (1) milk FROM fridge WHERE use_by_date >= GET_DATE() ORDER BY use_by_date ASC #YouMightBeaDBA RonDBA #youmightbeaDBA if you read @buckwoody's and @BrentO's blogs. ryaneastabrook @buckwoody omg, you have to stand up a website with these on them, they are awesome #youmightbeaDBA soulvy @StrateSQL @LadyRuna Or a "Splat" #youmightbeaDBA speedracer You can still fall asleep after three cups of coffee #youmightbeaDBA speedracer You retweet @buckwoody on a Friday night #youmightbeaDBA speedracer You can still fall asleep after three cups of coffee #youmightbeaDBA speedracer Developers make you twitch #youmightbeaDBA sqlagentman You know what X/1024*8 is. #YouMightBeADBA SqlAsylum Your still in the office at 5:00 on memorial day weekend. #youmightbeadba :) SQLBob Whenever someone you know gets pregnant you bring up INNER JOINs or SQL Injection attacks... #youmightbeaDBA SQLChicken You know one or more SQL folks in the community with an animal in their username #youmightbeaDBA SQLChicken You've used one or more car analogies to explain how a database works #youmightbeaDBA SQLChicken “@sqljoe: #youmightbeaDBA if you applied to attend #sqlu and requested @SQLChicken to pull strings for you” lmao nice! SQLChicken When talking about SSIS your discussions break down into various jokes about packages #youmightbeaDBA SQLChicken Just SEEING the code for cursors makes you break out in hives #youmightbeaDBA SQLChicken Just SEEING the code for cursors makes you break out in hives #youmightbeaDBA SQLCraftsman You coined the phrase "Magic SAN Dust" because calling a vendor's marketing claims BS is not acceptable in a meeting. #YouMightBeADBA SQLCraftsman If you hear about a new feature with the acronym "DAC" and wonder what disaster of a feature it is attached to this time. #YouMightBeADBA SQLCraftsman You really own a "Stick of Much Developer Whacking" #YouMightBeADBA SQLCraftsman You coined the phrase "Magic SAN Dust" because calling a vendor's marketing claims BS is not acceptable in a meeting. #YouMightBeADBA SQLCraftsman Default Blame Acceptor #YouMightBeADBA SQLCraftsman If you hear about a new feature with the acronym "DAC" and wonder what disaster of a feature it is attached to this time. #YouMightBeADBA SQLCraftsman Default Blame Acceptor #YouMightBeADBA SQLCraftsman If you hear about a new feature with the acronym "DAC" and wonder what disaster of a feature it is attached to this time. #YouMightBeADBA sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you wished your wife knew T-sql. USE ShoppingList SELECT NecessaryItems from Supermarket WHERE Category<> ("junk food") sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if the first thing you kiss when you wake up is your mobile for not waking you up in the middle of the night sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if your wife has a "Do Not Fly" family vacation list of her own including your laptop and mobile sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you have researched for DBA Anonymous groups and attended a #SSUG willing to drop your database (vice) sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if your only maintenance windows are staff meetings sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you think of yourself as "The One" in The Matrix "balancing the equation" from The Architect's (developers) poor coding sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you think @PaulRandal should have played the Oracle in The Matrix sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if home CD & Movie collection is stored in secured containers,in logical order & naming convention,and with a backup copy sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you applied to attend #sqlu and requested @SQLChicken to pull strings for you sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you have tried to TiVo @MidnightDBA broadcasts sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if your #sql user group feels like #AA meetings sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you thought of bringing your #sql books to #sqlsaturday and #sqlpass for autographs sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if #sqlpass feels like the #oscars sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you are proud of your small package SQLLawman #youmightbeaDBA when you hear MDX and Acura is not first thought that comes to mind. sqlrunner If your wife double checks that there isn't a SQLSat within 200 miles of your vacation destination #youmightbeaDBA sqlrunner When you're on a conference call and your wife thinks your speaking in a foreign language #youmightbeaDBA sqlrunner When you're on a conference call and your wife thinks your speaking in a foreign language #youmightbeaDBA sqlrunner You treat the word 'access' as a verb, not a noun #youmightbeaDBA sqlrunner If you are happy with sub-second performance #youmightbeaDBA sqlrunner When you know the names of the NOC people AND their families #youmightbeadba sqlrunner When you know the names of the NOC people AND their families #youmightbeadba sqlrunner Your company set's up international phone coverage for your cruise #youmightbeaDBA sqlsamson @buckwoody if your manager asks you for data and you respond with "there's a script for that" #youmightbeadba sqlsamson @buckwoody If you receive more messages from your server then your spouse #youmightbeadba SQLSoldier You've spent all night Valentines Day upgrading the SQL Servers and forgot to tell your wife you'd be working late. #youmightbeadba SQLSoldier You're flattered when someone calls you a geek. #youmightbeadba SQLSoldier @llangit @mrdenny it's 11pm on a holiday weekend, & your reading stupid jokes on Twitter then #youmightbeadba SQLSoldier Your manager borrows lunch money from you because your salary is 30% higher than his. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You think "intellisense" is a double negative because it's not intelligent nor makes sense. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier 75% of the emails you receive at home have the phrase "now following you on Twitter!" in the subject line. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You petition Ken Burns to remake Office Space because it should have been 18 hours long. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You select a candidate for a Jr DBA position because his resume said he's willing to get your coffee. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Somebody misquotes @PaulRandall and you call him on your cell to verify. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You wish the elevator in your building was slower because it's the last time you'll be left alone all day. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier The developers sacrifice small animals before giving you their code for review. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Developers bring you coffee and a BLT when you review their code. #youmightbeaDBA #IWish SQLSoldier You can get out of any family get-together by saying you have to work and nobody questions it. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You've requested a HP Superdome for you "test" box. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your leave work early because your internet connection to the data center is better at home #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier The new CEO asks you to justify your salary, so you go on vacation for 2 weeks. And he never questions you again. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You cheer when Milton burns down the company in Office Space #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier A dev. asks if you've heard about some great new feature in SQL and you show the 16 blog posts you wrote on it ... last year #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your dev team is still testing SQL 2008 and you're already planning for SQL 11. #youmightbeaDBA #TrueStory SQLSoldier The new CEO asks you to justify your salary, so you go on vacation for 2 weeks. And he never questions you again. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your dev team is still testing SQL 2008 and you're already planning for SQL 11. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You use a cell phone service coverage map to plan your next vacation. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You come in to work at 7 AM because it gives you at least 3 hours without any developers around. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You figure out a way to make take your wife on a cruise and deduct it as a business expense. #youmightbeaDBA #sqlcruise SQLSoldier You name your cat SQLDog because the name @SQLCat was already taken. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You rate your blog posts based on the number of retweets you get. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You disable random logins just to mess with people. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You fall for the pickup line, "Hey baby, what's your collation?" #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You can blame an outage on anyone in the company because you're the only one that knows how to find out what really happened #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You can blame an outage on anyone in the company because you're the only one that knows how to find out what really happened #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You cheer when Milton burns down the company in Office Space #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your leave work early because your internet connection to the data center is better at home #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You cheer when Milton burns down the company in Office Space #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your think the 4 food groups are coffee, bacon, fast food, and Mountain Dew. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You tell someone your job title and they ask "What?" You describe it and they ask "What?". So you say "computer geek". #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier The #1 referrer to your blog is Twitter.com. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your idea of a good time on a Saturday involves free training. #youmightbeaDBA #sqlsat43 SQLSoldier You write a book that all of your co-workers have and none have read it. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You write a book that sells a couple thousand copies and is heralded a best seller. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier No matter how sick you are, you go to work if it's time to pass the pager on to the next guy. #youmightbeaDBA #TrueStory SQLSoldier You go out on the town, and strangers walk up to you and say, "Hey you're that SQL guy" #youmightbeaDBA #TrueStory SQLSoldier Your wife asks you to fix something, and you request a downtime window. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your wife asks when you'll be home, and you tell her that you wish you knew. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your best pickup line, "Hey baby, what's your collation?" #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your wife asks when you'll be home, and you tell her that you wish you knew. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You know that @BuckWoody is not someone's porno name. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You list TSQL as your native language on the 2010 census. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Starbucks' stock price drops every time you go on vacation. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You're happy when the web master says that the website is down. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You know that @BuckWoody is not someone's porno name. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You get mad when someone calls your car a "heap" because you've always considered it to be a "clustered index". #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier Your blog has more hits than your company's website. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You systematically remove the asterisk key from all keyboards in the company except yours. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier When asked if you recycle, you reply that you run sp_cycle_errorlog every night at midnight #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You wouldn't allow someone named @AdamMachanic to work on your car. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You switch offices every 3 days to avoid developers #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier PSS has your number on speed dial. #youmightbeaDBA SQLSoldier You frown when you they tell Neo that he's going to the Oracle #youmightbeaDBA swhaley you regretted saying "This shouldn't effect production" #youmightbeaDBA swhaley you regretted saying "This shouldn't effect production" #youmightbeaDBA Tarwn A pleasurable saturday means spending the day learning more about what you already do the rest of the week #youmightbeaDBA ...oh, wait... thelostforum For great justice; all our base are belong to YOU !! #youmightbeadba thelostforum @SQLSoldier: You need a witness to use a mirror #youmightbeaDBA ;) TimCost you capitalize key words. always. everywhere. you can't help it, usually don't even notice. #youmightbeaDBA Toshana Your the only one in your company not impressed with the developers new application. #youmightbeaDBA venzann Coming soon from a (respected) book publisher - @buckwoody's #youmightbeaDBA venzann He's on a role tonight. @buckwoody is summing up my life with his #youmightbeaDBA tweets... venzann I love the #youmightbeaDBA tag. Found at least 6 new DBAs to follow.. venzann He's on a role tonight. @buckwoody is summing up my life with his #youmightbeaDBA tweets... venzann You use #sqlhelp as a primary resource during troubleshooting #youmightbeaDBA venzann You insist on stricter password security for your sql servers than you implement on your own laptop #youmightbeaDBA WesBrownSQL @buckwoody you are up so late the only tweets you see are from @buckwoody #youmightbeaDBA WesBrownSQL @SQLSoldier you are upgrading all your 2005 prod servers to 2008 R2 on a three day weekend... #youmightbeaDBA zippy1981 #youmightbeaDBA if everytime you do something with #mongodb you think of the Vulcan proverb "only Nixon could go to China." Share this post: email it! | bookmark it! | digg it! | reddit! | kick it! | live it!

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