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  • TPC-H Benchmarks on SQL Server 2014 with Columnstore

    - by jchang
    Three TPC-H benchmark results were published in April of this year at SQL Server 2014 launch, where the new updateable columnstore feature was used. SQL Server 2012 had non-updateable columnstore that required the base table to exist in rowstore form. This was not used in the one published TPC-H benchmark result on SQL Server 2012, which includes two refresh stored procedures, one inserting rows, the second deleting rows. It is possible that the TPC-H rules do not allow a view to union two tables?...(read more)

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  • Online Reputation Management - The Basics

    Bad publicity is just a reality of doing business these days, especially for any company that is even moderately in the public eye. With hundreds of television channels, a print media network larger than the entire European Union and the Internet, negative comments are hurled at everyone from the Pope to Oprah.

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  • Droit à l'oubli : Microsoft travaille également sur un moyen pour demander la suppression des données sensibles sur son moteur Bing

    Droit à l'oubli : Microsoft travaille également sur un moyen pour demander la suppression des données sensibles sur son moteur BingSuite à la décision de la Cour de Justice de l'Union européenne (CJUE) autorisant les internautes européens à avoir recours au droit à l'oubli, les projecteurs se sont tournés vers Google, de par sa part de marché importante dans le domaine de la recherche en ligne, alors que tous les acteurs de la recherche en ligne en Europe sont concernés par cette mesure.Tout...

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  • INDIA Legislation: New State 'Telangana' Added in IN_STATES System Lookup

    - by LieveDC
    With effect from June 02, 2014 the new state of Telangana will be operational in the Indian Union.Details of the new state are explained in the official gazette released on 1 March, 2014 by the Ministry of Home Affairs: http://mha.nic.in/sites/upload_files/mha/files/APRegACT2014_0.pdf This new State has been added in the IN_STATES System Lookup: a new lookup code 'TG' with meaning 'Telangana' has been added.For available patches on different R12 patch levels check out: Doc ID 1676224.1 New State Telangana Be Added In IN_STATES System Lookup.

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  • boolean operations on meshes

    - by lathomas64
    given a set of vertices and triangles for each mesh. Does anyone know of an algorithm, or a place to start looking( I tried google first but haven't found a good place to get started) to perform boolean operations on said meshes and get a set of vertices and triangle for the resulting mesh? Of particular interest are subtraction and union. Example pictures: http://www.rhino3d.com/4/help/Commands/Booleans.htm

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  • Droit à l'oubli : Google lance son formulaire de demande de retrait des données sensibles et précise les conditions d'utilisation

    Droit à l'oubli : Google lance son formulaire de demande de retrait des données sensibles et précise les conditions d'utilisationGoogle met à la disposition des internautes européens un formulaire pour ceux qui veulent avoir recours au droit à l'oubli, afin que le moteur de recherche n'affiche plus dans ses résultats des liens vers des sites tiers contenant des infirmations sensibles sur ceux-ci.Le lancement de ce formulaire fait suite à une décision de la Cour de Justice de l'Union européenne...

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  • Le Parlement européen préconise la suspension d'un accord avec Washington sur les données bancaires, PRISM en est la cause principale

    Le Parlement européen préconise la suspension d'un accord avec Washington sur les données bancaires, PRISM en est la cause principale Mercredi 23 octobre le Parlement européen a adopté en session plénière, à une courte majorité (280 voix pour, 254 contre, 20 abstentions), une résolution non contraignante demandant la suspension de l'accord sur la transmission de certaines données financières de l'Union européenne vers les Etats-Unis. Entré en vigueur en août 2010 dans le cadre du programme de...

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  • Droit à l'oubli : Google compte signaler les demandes de suppression aux internautes lorsque leurs résultats de recherche ont été affectés

    Droit à l'oubli : Google aurait l'intention de signaler les demandes de suppression aux internautes lorsque leurs résultats de recherche ont été affectésSuite à un arrêté de la Cour de justice de l'Union européenne (CJUE) Google avait lancé il y a quelques jours un formulaire pour permettre aux internautes européens d'avoir recours au droit à l'oubli. Le géant de la recherche compte signaler cette forme « de censure » des informations qu'elle affiche, au cas où le droit à l'oubli aurait été appliqué...

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  • Viviane Reding envisage la création d'une CIA européenne, un contrepoids à la NSA à l'horizon 2020 ?

    Viviane Reding envisage la création d'une CIA européenne, un contrepoids à la NSA à l'horizon 2020 ? Dans une interview accordée au journal grec Naftemporiki, Viviane Reding, vice-présidente de la Commission de Bruxelles et commissaire à la justice, a proposé un renforcement de la coopération entre les services secrets des États membres de l'Union. « Il faut former un contrepoids à l'Agence de sécurité nationale américaine (NSA). C'est pourquoi je propose de créer un Service européen de renseignement...

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  • UE : l'adoption des solutions libres devrait entraîner une réduction des coûts de plus d'un milliard d'euros pour le secteur public européen

    Le secteur public pourrait économiser plus d'un milliard d'euros en adoptant les solutions libres selon l'Union européenne, qui publie un guide pour aider les institutions L'Europe estime que l'ouverture des entreprises européennes aux solutions libres peut entraîner d'énormes réductions des coûts.La commission européenne met en garde les institutions publiques sur les dangers de trop compter sur un fournisseur unique des solutions d'informations, en particulier ceux proposant des produits « fermés ».L'organisation a publié un guide dont le but est d'aider les pouvoirs publics à adopter davantage les standards ouverts. Selon le guide, ce virage pourrait réduire les coûts de 1,1 milliard d'euros ...

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  • CloneZilla PXE Boot Without NFS

    - by John
    I am trying to setup CloneZilla to be bootable via PXE without using NFS. I do not have NFS running on our PXE server and would like to keep it that way. However, most of the information that I have found online indicates that you need to setup NFS in order to PXE boot CloneZilla. I believe that I am pretty close in getting it to work, but am not sure where to go next. Listed below are the different PXE menu option configurations that I have used so far. LABEL Clonezilla Live MENU LABEL Clonezilla Live KERNEL utilities/clonezilla/vmlinuz APPEND initrd=utilities/clonezilla/initrd.img boot=live live-config noswap nolocales edd=on nomodeset ocs_live_run="ocs-live-general" ocs_live_extra_param="" ocs_live_keymap="" ocs_live_batch="no" o$ I have also tried the following append lines, without success: APPEND initrd=utilities/clonezilla/initrd.img boot=live union=aufs noswap noprompt vga=788 fetch=tftp://10.130.155.23/filesystem.squashfs APPEND initrd=utilities/clonezilla/initrd.img boot=live union=aufs noswap noprompt vga=normal nomodeset nosplash fetch=tftp://10.130.155.23/filesystem.squashfs Each of them have resulted in a no go with the following error: "Unable to find a live file system on the network". It looks like it gets to the point of trying to load the filesystem.squashfs file, hangs, and then throws the error. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

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  • Debugging HTML & JavaScript with Firebug

    - by MattDiPasquale
    I made a JSONP widget. However, when one of the partner sites put it in their page, (1) it doesn't render at all in IE and (2) in other browsers (Firefox & Google Chrome), the HTML of the widget renders incorrectly: the <aside> closes prematurely, before the Financial Aid Glossary. It's something specific to that page because it works fine on this example college resource center page. To fix these two issues, I tried saving the page source to a local file and messing around with the local file and with Firebug, deleting DOM elements and stuff. I even tried fixing the errors that The W3C Markup Validation Service found. But, I still couldn't get it to render correctly. How should I tell them to change their page so that the widget renders correctly? Or, how should I update the widget script I wrote? They may take their page down since it's not rendering correctly, so here's the source of the page just in case: <!DOCTYPE html> <html> <head id="ctl01_Head1" profile="New Jersey Credit Union League"><title> College Resource Center - New Jersey Credit Union League </title> <link rel='stylesheet' type='text/css' href='http://ajax.googleapis.com/ajax/libs/jqueryui/1.8.6/themes/base/jquery.ui.all.css' /> <link rel='stylesheet' type='text/css' href='/csshandler.ashx?skin=InnerTemplate&amp;s=1&amp;v=2.3.5.8' /> <!--[if IE]> <script defer="defer" src="http://njcul.org/ClientScript/html5.js" type="text/javascript"></script> <![endif]--> <!--[if lt IE 7]> <link rel="stylesheet" href="http://njcul.org/Data/Sites/1/skins/InnerTemplate/IESpecific.css?cb=9d546eec-6752-4067-8f94-9a5b642213e4" type="text/css" id="IE6CSS" /> <![endif]--> <!--[if IE 7]> <link rel="stylesheet" href="http://njcul.org/Data/Sites/1/skins/InnerTemplate/IE7Specific.css?cb=9d546eec-6752-4067-8f94-9a5b642213e4" 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$("#toolbarbut").fadeOut("slow");} $(document).ready(function(){ $("span.downarr a").click(function() {HideMenuToolbar(); Set_Cookie('openstate', 'closed')}); $("span.showbar a").click(function() {ShowMenuToolbar(); Set_Cookie('openstate', 'open') }); $("span.downarr a, span.showbar a").click(function() { return false; }); var openState = Get_Cookie('openstate'); if(openState != null){ if(openState == 'closed'){HideMenuToolbar();} if(openState == 'open'){ShowMenuToolbar();}} }); </script> <div> <input type="hidden" name="ctl01$ctl06" id="ctl01_ctl06" /> </div> <div> <input type="hidden" name="__EVENTVALIDATION" id="__EVENTVALIDATION" value="/wEWBQKv1e3VCALs75XzDgL+qaz3AwLv26TNCQKS/MC2Dg==" /> </div> <script type="text/javascript">Sys.Application.add_load(function() { var form = Sys.WebForms.PageRequestManager.getInstance()._form; form._initialAction = form.action = window.location.href; }); </script> <script type="text/javascript"> //<![CDATA[ (function() {var fn = function() 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"https://ssl." : "http://www."); document.write(unescape("%3Cscript src='" + gaJsHost + "google-analytics.com/ga.js' type='text/javascript'%3E%3C/script%3E")); </script> <script type="text/javascript"> try{ var mojoPageTracker = _gat._getTracker("UA-19333588-1"); mojoPageTracker._setCustomVar(1, "member-type", "anonymous", 1);mojoPageTracker._trackPageview(); } catch(err) {} </script> <script type="text/javascript"> //<![CDATA[ Sys.Application.initialize(); //]]> </script> </form> </body> </html>

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  • What's the right way to do mutable data structures (e.g., skip lists, splay trees) in F#?

    - by dan
    What's a good way to implement mutable data structures in F#? The reason I’m asking is because I want to go back and implement the data structures I learned about in the algorithms class I took this semester (skip lists, splay trees, fusion trees, y-fast tries, van Emde Boas trees, etc.), which was a pure theory course with no coding whatsoever, and I figure I might as well try to learn F# while I’m doing it. I know that I “should” use finger trees to get splay tree functionality in a functional language, and that I should do something with laziness to get skip-list functionality, etc. , but I want to get the basics nailed down before I try playing with purely functional implementations. There are lots of examples of how to do functional data structures in F#, but there isn’t much on how to do mutable data structures, so I started by fixing up the doubly linked list here into something that allows inserts and deletes anywhere. My plan is to turn this into a skip list, and then use a similar structure (discriminated union of a record) for the tree structures I want to implement. Before I start on something more substantial, is there a better way to do mutable structures like this in F#? Should I just use records and not bother with the discriminated union? Should I use a class instead? Is this question "not even wrong"? Should I be doing the mutable structures in C#, and not dip into F# until I want to compare them to their purely functional counterparts? And, if a DU of records is what I want, could I have written the code below better or more idiomatically? It seems like there's a lot of redundancy here, but I'm not sure how to get rid of it. module DoublyLinkedList = type 'a ll = | None | Node of 'a ll_node and 'a ll_node = { mutable Prev: 'a ll; Element : 'a ; mutable Next: 'a ll; } let insert x l = match l with | None -> Node({ Prev=None; Element=x; Next=None }) | Node(node) -> match node.Prev with | None -> let new_node = { Prev=None; Element=x; Next=Node(node)} node.Prev <- Node(new_node) Node(new_node) | Node(prev_node) -> let new_node = { Prev=node.Prev; Element=x; Next=Node(node)} node.Prev <- Node(new_node) prev_node.Next <- Node(new_node) Node(prev_node) let rec nth n l = match n, l with | _,None -> None | _,Node(node) when n > 0 -> nth (n-1) node.Next | _,Node(node) when n < 0 -> nth (n+1) node.Prev | _,Node(node) -> Node(node) //hopefully only when n = 0 :-) let rec printLinkedList head = match head with | None -> () | Node(x) -> let prev = match x.Prev with | None -> "-" | Node(y) -> y.Element.ToString() let cur = x.Element.ToString() let next = match x.Next with | None -> "-" | Node(y) -> y.Element.ToString() printfn "%s, <- %s -> %s" prev cur next printLinkedList x.Next

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  • C++ Unions bit fields task

    - by learningtolive
    Can somebody clear me out why would I use union and with what purpose the same address for the cin'ed variable and bit field (task from the Schildts C++ book)? In other words why would I use union for : char ch; struct byte bit; // Display the ASCII code in binary for characters. #include <iostream> #include <conio.h> using namespace std; // a bit field that will be decoded struct byte { unsigned a : 1; unsigned b : 1; unsigned c : 1; unsigned d : 1; unsigned e : 1; unsigned f : 1; unsigned g : 1; unsigned h : 1; }; union bits { char ch; struct byte bit; } ascii ; void disp_bits(bits b); int main() { do { cin >> ascii.ch; cout << ": "; disp_bits(ascii); } while(ascii.ch!='q'); // quit if q typed return 0; } // Display the bit pattern for each character. void disp_bits(bits b) { if(b.bit.h) cout << "1 "; else cout << "0 "; if(b.bit.g) cout << "1 "; else cout << "0 "; if(b.bit.f) cout << "1 "; else cout << "0 "; if(b.bit.e) cout << "1 "; else cout << "0 "; if(b.bit.d) cout << "1 "; else cout << "0 "; if(b.bit.c) cout << "1 "; else cout << "0 "; if(b.bit.b) cout << "1 "; else cout << "0 "; if(b.bit.a) cout << "1 "; else cout << "0 "; cout << "\n"; }

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  • You Might Be a DBA

    - by BuckWoody
    With all apologies to Jeff Foxworthy, I was up late Friday night on a holiday weekend (which translated into T-SQL becomes “Maintenance Window”) and I got bored in between the two or three minutes I had between clicks. So I started a “Twitter” meme – and it just took off. I haven’t cleaned these up much, but here, in author order as of Saturday the 29th of May is the list “You might be a DBA” from around the Twitterverse: buckwoody Your two main enemies are developers and SAN admins #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody People can use Access as a cross or garlic on you #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You always plan an exit strategy, even when entering a McDonald's #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You can't explain to your family what you really do for a living #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have at least one set of scripts you won't share #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have an opinion on the best code-beautifier #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have children older than the rest of your team #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You and the Oracle DBA would kill each other, but you'll happily fight off a developer together first #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've threatened to quit if they give anyone the sa password on production #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've sent a vendor suggestions on improving their database design or code (and been ignored) #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've sent a vendor suggestions on improving their database design or code (and been ignored) #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have an opinion on the best code-beautifier #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have at least one set of scripts you won't share #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You refer to co-workers as "carbon-units" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Being paranoid is on your resume at the top #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Everyone comes to your cube to find the MSDN DVD's #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You always plan an exit strategy, even when entering a McDonald's #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've worn down developers to get your way by explaining normalization levels #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You refer to clothes as "Data Abstractions" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Users pester you to be able to put data in a database, then they pester you to take it out and put it in Excel #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Others try to de-duplicate data, you try to copy it to more than three locations #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have at least one DLT tape in the trunk of your car #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You use twitter and facebook to talk with colleagues because there's no one else in your company that does what you do #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Your spouse knows what "ETL" means #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've referred to yourself as the "Data Janitor" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You don't have positive connotations of the word "upgrade" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You get your coffee before you check your servers, because you know you won't get any if you don't #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You always come to work through the back door so no one hijacks you on the way to your cube #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You check your server logs before you check your e-mail in the morning so you can reply "Yeah, I already fixed that." #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have more conference badges than clean socks #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Your coffee mug says "It depends" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You can convince a boss that you need 16GB of RAM in your laptop #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've used ebay to find production equipment #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You pad all project timelines by 2X, and you still miss them #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You know when your company is acquiring another even before the CFO #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You pad all project timelines by 2X, and you still miss them #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You call aspirin "work vitamins" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You get the same amount of sleep even after you have a child #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You obsess about performance metrics from over one year ago #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody The first thing you buy after the database software is aftermarket tools to manage the database software #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've tried to convince someone else to become a DBA #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You use twitter and facebook to talk with colleagues because there's no one else in your company that does what you do #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You only know other DBA's by their Tweet Handle #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've explained the difference between 32 and 64-bit to more than one manager in terms they can understand, using puppets #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Your two main enemies are developers and SAN admins #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've driven to the Datacenter to install SQL Server because "you don't trust those NOC admins" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You pay more for faster Internet connections than cable at home so you don't have to drive in #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You call texting a "queuing system" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You know that if someone can read Perl, they manage an Oracle system #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have an e-mail rule for backup notifications #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Your food pyramid includes coffee, salt and fat #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You wish everything had a graphical query plan #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You refactor your e-mails #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've gotten more help from twitter and facebook than all your years in college #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You would pay money for a license plate that has the letters S-Q-L together #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have actually considered making a RAID array from thumb drives #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Everything on your laptop is installed from your MSDN subscription #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've written blog posts on technology you've never actually implemented in production #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Everything on your laptop is installed from your MSDN subscription #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody @MidnightDBA Click the #youmightbeaDBA tag. I've had WAY too much coffee today.  buckwoody There is no other position that is 1-deep except you and the CEO #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody When you watch "The Office" you call it "OJT" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You would pay money for a license plate that has the letters S-Q-L together #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Your blog would make a "best practices" or "worst practices" book #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You have actually considered making a RAID array from thumb drives #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody The first thing you install on your netbook is SSMS #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Everything on your laptop is installed from your MSDN subscription #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Your watch is set to UTC because it's just easier #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You make plenty of money, but you're excited to get a $2.00 squeeze-ball from Quest and Redgate #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You make plenty of money, but you're excited to get a $2.00 squeeze-ball from Quest and Redgate #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You think data can be represented as something OTHER than XML #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You tell people that you made a database query go faster, and expect them to be happy for you #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You take the word "NoSQL" as a personal attack #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody People can use Access as a cross or garlic on you #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody * == bad #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody * == bad #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody There are just as many females in your technical field as males #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody People can use Access as a cross or garlic on you #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've gotten more help from twitter and facebook than all your years in college #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You think that something OTHER than the database might be the performance bottleneck #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You refer to time as a "Clustered Index" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You know why "user" refers to both business people and crack addicts #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You make plenty of money, but you're excited to get a $2.00 squeeze-ball from Quest and Redgate #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You can't explain to your family what you really do for a living #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You tell people that you made a database query go faster, and expect them to be happy for you #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You think a millisecond is a really long time #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You're sitting and typing #youmightbeaDBA when you could be outside #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You can't wait for a technical conference so you can wear a kilt - and you're not Scottish #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You know that "DBA" stands for "Default Blame Acceptor" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody People can use Access as a cross or garlic on you #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You know what "the truth, thole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me Codd" means #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've gotten more help from twitter and facebook than all your years in college #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You can't talk fast enough to get a concept out of your head so you tweet it instead #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You cry when someone doesn't use a WHERE clause #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You think data can be represented as something OTHER than XML #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You think "Set theory" is not an verb but a noun #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You try to convince random strangers to vote on your Connect item #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You think 3 hours of contiguous sleep is a good thing #youmightbeaDBA or #youmightbeamother  buckwoody You don't like Oracle, and not just because of what she did to Neo #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You know when to say "sequel" and "s-q-l" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You know where the data is #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You refer to your children as "Fully Redundant Mirrors" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Holiday == "Maintenance Window" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Your laptop is more powerful than the servers in most companies - including your own #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You capitalize SELECTed words #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You take the word "NoSQL" as a personal attack #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You know why "user" refers to both business people and crack addicts #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You cringe in public when the word "upgrade" is used in a sentence #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Holiday == "Maintenance Window" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody All Data Is MetaData means something to you #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You've never seen the driveway to your house in the daylight #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You think that something OTHER than the database might be the performance bottleneck #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Most of your bloodstream is composed of caffeine #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody Your task list is labeled "CRUD Matrix" #youmightbeaDBA  buckwoody You call your wife/husband a "Linked Server" #youmightbeaDBA  anonythemouse When someone tells you they are going to take a dump and you wonder of which database then #youmightbeaDBA  anonythemouse When it's 11pm on a holiday weekend and you are working #youmightbeaDBA  anonythemouse When you sit down at a table and look for it's primary key #youmightbeaDBA  anonythemouse When getting milk from the fridge you check the expiry date is > getdate() #youmightbeaDBA  blakmk when you wake up dreaming about sql #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver You think a @buckwoody bobblehead would be a cool thing to have on the dashboard of your car #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver Your friends don't understand why you think there's a difference between single and double quotes #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver Even the newest employees know your name from all the downtime notices you've sent out #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver You sometimes feel anxious and think "I should test restoring those backups" and then the feeling passes #youmightbeadba  CharlesGarver You know what a co-worker means when they ask "how is your squirrel server?" #youmightbeadba  CharlesGarver You can't sleep at night and you ponder the logisitcs of collecting every copy of Access for the world's biggest bonfire #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver You can't sleep at night and you ponder the logisitcs of collecting every copy of Access for the world's biggest bonfire #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver You're willing to move someone's job up in priority for a box of #voodoodonuts #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver Each person in your company seems to think you work for THEM #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver You have a Love/Hate relationship going on with #Microsoft #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver People ask you to troubleshoot their Access program #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver The first words you hear in the morning are 'your voicemail box is full' #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver The thought of disrupting 500 people's work so you can do something doesn't phase you #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver You can't sleep at night and you ponder the logisitcs of collecting every copy of Access for the world's biggest bonfire #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver Your home computer is backed up in 3 different places #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver Your wardrobe for work includes pajamas #youmightbeaDBA  CharlesGarver Someone tells you to look in the INDEX and you look puzzled before finally going to the back of the book. #youmightbeaDBA  chuckboycejr If you have ever set up a SQLAgent job to email your mobile phone to serve as an alarm clock #youmightbeaDBA  chuckboycejr If you'd rather meet Itzik than Jay Z #youmightbeaDBA  chuckboycejr If you'd rather meet Itzik than Jay Z #youmightbeaDBA  chuckboycejr If you'd wrestle a SysAdmin to the ground to implement #DPA best practices as per @aspiringgeek #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy I need to be up in 7 hours, so I'm off to bed! I'll have to read the rest of @buckwoody's #youmightbeaDBA posts in the AM. (g'night Buck!)  databaseguy When people ask you about your house, the first thing you describe is the network. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy The last thing you say at the office each day is, "is anybody else here? I'm shutting off the lights!" #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy Your blood pressure rises when you read application specs drafted by marketing. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy A good day at work is one when nobody pays you no mind. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You care about latches and wait states. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You have worked over 200 hours on a performance tuning project that required no application changes at all. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy The late-night security guard knows the names of your spouse and kids. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You have had vigorous debates about whether it should be pronounced "sequel" or "ess-queue-ell". #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You have VPN and RDP software installed on your phone ... just in case. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You have edited a data file by hand, just to see what would happen. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You decorate your office walls with database catalog posters. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You've built programs that access data just to keep other developers from asking you to run queries all the time. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy When you watch movies like The Matrix, you find yourself calculating the fasibility of storing all that data. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You have tried to convince someone to spend money on an SSD storage array. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy When CPU is spiked on a server, you want to gather forensic evidence. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You have to remind developers not to push code to production without checking if the database is ready. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy Nobody cares what you wear to work, as long as the thing keeps running. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy Telepathy is a job requirement when working with app dev teams. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You read database statistics for the educational value. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy And your boss freely admits this to anyone within earshot. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy Your boss cannot explain or understand what you do. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You envision ERDs when you see a GUI. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You say things like "applications come and go, but data lasts forever." #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You have memorized the names of several of the AdventureWorks employees. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You know what MAXDOP setting you can get away with for a big query based on current server load. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy And you immediately recognize the recursion in my last tweet. #youmightbeaDBA  databaseguy You find 50 simultaneous tweets from @buckwoody about #youmightbeaDBA :O)  DBAishness You have "funny stories" about the times your developers accidentally deleted the T-log in their test environment. #youmightbeaDBA  DBAishness Planning to slice and dice your MDW data with PowerPivot makes you giggle like a schoolgirl. #youmightbeaDBA  donalddotfarmer You think @buckwoody lives in the "real world." #youmightbeaDBA  jamach09 @buckwoody #youmightbeaDBA Why go outside when you can sit in the nice cool server room?  jamach09 If you refer to procreation as "Replication", #youmightbeaDBA.  jamach09 If you think ORM is a four-letter word, #youmightbeaDBA  JamesMarsh If you have ever preached the value of Source Code Control, #YouMightBeADBA  jethrocarr @venzann You store your shopping list in a ACID compliant DB #youmightbeaDBA  joe_positive @buckwoody thought it stood for "Don't Bother Asking" #youmightbeaDBA  joe_positive when you check your IT Events Calendar before making weekend plans #youmightbeaDBA  LadyRuna You cringe whenever someone calls Excel a database #youmightbeaDBA  LadyRuna When the waiter says he'll be your server today, you ask how many terabytes he is #youmightbeaDBA  LadyRuna you always call the asterisk a "Star" #youmightbeaDBA  LadyRuna You walk into a server room, say "Nice RACK!" and everyone there knows you're talking about server rack... #youmightbeaDBA  LadyRuna You receive more messages from servers than from friends #youmightbeaDBA  LadyRuna hmmm... #youmightbeaDBA if your recipe for gumbo is "SELECT * FROM Refrigerator"  markjholmes @SQLSoldier Heh. #youmightbeaDBA if you correct other DBAs' spelling of @PaulRandal  markjholmes #youmightbeaDBA if you actually test RAID5 vs RAID10 on your SAN because when it comes to configuration, "it depends."  markjholmes #youmightbeaDBA if you have at least 3 definitions of the word "cluster"  MarlonRibunal 3 Words: @BrentO, snicker, & Access #youmightbeaDBA  MarlonRibunal @onpnt @mikeSQL my appeal was a couple of mins late. Enjoying #youmightbeaDBA  MarlonRibunal @mikeSQL @onpnt pls, don't mention bacon #youmightbeaDBA  merv @buckwoody You HATE 3-way joins #youmightbeaDBA  MidnightDBA If you're up at midnight Tweeting about SQL #youmightbeaDBA  MidnightDBA @buckwoody I'd noticed that. :) #youmightbeaDBA  mikeSQL when people talk about "their type" you're thinking varchar, bigint, binary, etc #youmightbeadba  mikeSQL people ask you to go to lunch , but you can't go because you're attending #SQLlunch #youmightbeadba  mikeSQL you laugh for hours at all of the #sqlmoviequotes ....things in which a normal individual would scratch their head at. #youmightbeadba  mikeSQL you laugh for hours at all of the #sqlmoviequotes ....things in which a normal individual would scratch their head at. #youmightbeadba  mrdenny If you think that @buckwoody's demo using PowerPivot to analyze index usage data from DMVs is awesome then #youmightbeaDBA  mrdenny You wish @PaulRandal still worked at Microsoft so that they would make a bobble head of him #youmightbeadba  mrdenny When it's 11pm on a holiday weekend, and your posting stupid jokes on Twitter then #youmightbeadba  mrdenny If you go out with friends and wonder why no one's wearing a kilt then #YouMightBeADBA  mrdenny You can't do basic math, but you know off the top of your head how many CALs $14,412 can buy you. #YoumightbeaDBA  mrdenny If you've ever setup a SQL Job to email you to get you out of a regularly scheduled meeting #YouMightBeADBA.  mrdenny You throw up in your mouth a little when ever you here the word "Access". Even if it doesn't relate to a MS product. #YouMightBeADBA  msdtjones You spend more time listening to @buckwoody than your wife #youmightbeaDBA  NFDotCom You perform "hail deltas" on a regular basis. #YouMightBeADBA  NoelMcKinney If you tell your wife you want to go to Columbus Ohio for your wedding anniversary so you can attend #sqlsat42 then #youmightbeaDBA  NoelMcKinney You read a union is on strike and wonder if it's a UNION ALL #youmightbeaDBA  NoelMcKinney You read a union is on strike and wonder if it's a UNION ALL #youmightbeaDBA  NoelMcKinney Someone asks you to throw another log on the fire and you tell them not to worry about it because Autogrowth is turned on #youmightbeaDBA  Nuurdygirl Even if you have a girlfriend...its possible #youmightbeadba. Yeah-i said its possible!  Nuurdygirl When your girlfriend has to lean around the laptop to kiss you goodnight #youmightbeadba  Old_Man_Fish If you worry about how big your package is and how long it takes to finish #youmightbeaDBA  Old_Man_Fish If you no longer wonder if someone is in trouble or died if you are getting calls at 2AM #youmightbeaDBA  Old_Man_Fish If, when you hear the word ACCESS with no connotation you blood pressure jumps 50 points, #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt When you hear the word inject you immediately get concerned if your databases are OK #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt Your servers haven't been rebooted in a year #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You know why it's funny when @PaulRandal has the word, "Sheep" in a tweet #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You have read BOL without actually having a problem to figure out #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You can type "SELECT columns FROM tables" without typos but tipen ni Banglish ares a messis #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt DR strategies doesn't include the word, RAID in them #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt you can move a SQL Server instance to a new server without the users ever knowing #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You have made an SSIS package that is more than one step #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You have the balls to say no to your boss when they ask for the sa password #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt you google to trouble shoot a problem and end up at your own blog (and it fixes it) #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You talk your wife into moving the family vacation a week earlier so you can attend the areas local SSUG meeting #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt you can explain to a nontechnical person what a deadlock is #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You hope a girl asks you what your collation is #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt you make jokes that include the words shrink, truncate and 1205. And you are the only one that laughs at them #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You rate your ability to stay awake to work longer on blogs, twitter, forums and your day to day job with the 5 9's goal #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt you have major surgery and beg the doctor to release you back to work 5 days later because you miss your servers #youmightbeaDBA #TrueStory  onpnt You do have backups and you know how to use them #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt It's the network #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt When the developers get to work your mood changes rapidly #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt When someone says, "PASS", you first think of karaoke #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt Recruiters try to get you to call them *just* because they think you'll give them @BrentO contact info #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You chuckle every time you go to grab the "CLR" Calcium, Lime and Rust Remover to clean something #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt @MarlonRibunal @mikeSQL Sorry man, it was already in motion ;-) #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt When you have an "I love bacon" sticker on your laptop. #youmightbeaDBA http://twitpic.com/1ry671  onpnt You sing SELECT statements in the shower #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt When you see a chicken it doesn't remind you of food. It reminds you of a guy named Jorge #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt At time, SQL is your mistress #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt Your wife wonders if SQL is the code name of your mistress at times #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt it's Friday and you are on twitter thinking really hard about what would be funny for hash tag #youmightbeaDBA  onpnt You organize your wife's "decorative"pillows on the bed in a B-Tree structure #youmightbeaDBA  PaulWhiteNZ If you: SELECT TOP (1) milk FROM fridge WHERE use_by_date >= GET_DATE() ORDER BY use_by_date ASC #YouMightBeaDBA  RonDBA #youmightbeaDBA if you read @buckwoody's and @BrentO's blogs.  ryaneastabrook @buckwoody omg, you have to stand up a website with these on them, they are awesome #youmightbeaDBA  soulvy @StrateSQL @LadyRuna Or a "Splat" #youmightbeaDBA  speedracer You can still fall asleep after three cups of coffee #youmightbeaDBA  speedracer You retweet @buckwoody on a Friday night #youmightbeaDBA  speedracer You can still fall asleep after three cups of coffee #youmightbeaDBA  speedracer Developers make you twitch #youmightbeaDBA  sqlagentman You know what X/1024*8 is. #YouMightBeADBA  SqlAsylum Your still in the office at 5:00 on memorial day weekend. #youmightbeadba :)  SQLBob Whenever someone you know gets pregnant you bring up INNER JOINs or SQL Injection attacks... #youmightbeaDBA  SQLChicken You know one or more SQL folks in the community with an animal in their username #youmightbeaDBA  SQLChicken You've used one or more car analogies to explain how a database works #youmightbeaDBA  SQLChicken “@sqljoe: #youmightbeaDBA if you applied to attend #sqlu and requested @SQLChicken to pull strings for you” lmao nice!  SQLChicken When talking about SSIS your discussions break down into various jokes about packages #youmightbeaDBA  SQLChicken Just SEEING the code for cursors makes you break out in hives #youmightbeaDBA  SQLChicken Just SEEING the code for cursors makes you break out in hives #youmightbeaDBA  SQLCraftsman You coined the phrase "Magic SAN Dust" because calling a vendor's marketing claims BS is not acceptable in a meeting. #YouMightBeADBA  SQLCraftsman If you hear about a new feature with the acronym "DAC" and wonder what disaster of a feature it is attached to this time. #YouMightBeADBA  SQLCraftsman You really own a "Stick of Much Developer Whacking" #YouMightBeADBA  SQLCraftsman You coined the phrase "Magic SAN Dust" because calling a vendor's marketing claims BS is not acceptable in a meeting. #YouMightBeADBA  SQLCraftsman Default Blame Acceptor #YouMightBeADBA  SQLCraftsman If you hear about a new feature with the acronym "DAC" and wonder what disaster of a feature it is attached to this time. #YouMightBeADBA  SQLCraftsman Default Blame Acceptor #YouMightBeADBA  SQLCraftsman If you hear about a new feature with the acronym "DAC" and wonder what disaster of a feature it is attached to this time. #YouMightBeADBA  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you wished your wife knew T-sql. USE ShoppingList SELECT NecessaryItems from Supermarket WHERE Category<> ("junk food")  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if the first thing you kiss when you wake up is your mobile for not waking you up in the middle of the night  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if your wife has a "Do Not Fly" family vacation list of her own including your laptop and mobile  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you have researched for DBA Anonymous groups and attended a #SSUG willing to drop your database (vice)  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if your only maintenance windows are staff meetings  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you think of yourself as "The One" in The Matrix "balancing the equation" from The Architect's (developers) poor coding  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you think @PaulRandal should have played the Oracle in The Matrix  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if home CD & Movie collection is stored in secured containers,in logical order & naming convention,and with a backup copy  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you applied to attend #sqlu and requested @SQLChicken to pull strings for you  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you have tried to TiVo @MidnightDBA broadcasts  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if your #sql user group feels like #AA meetings  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you thought of bringing your #sql books to #sqlsaturday and #sqlpass for autographs  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if #sqlpass feels like the #oscars  sqljoe #youmightbeaDBA if you are proud of your small package  SQLLawman #youmightbeaDBA when you hear MDX and Acura is not first thought that comes to mind.  sqlrunner If your wife double checks that there isn't a SQLSat within 200 miles of your vacation destination #youmightbeaDBA  sqlrunner When you're on a conference call and your wife thinks your speaking in a foreign language #youmightbeaDBA  sqlrunner When you're on a conference call and your wife thinks your speaking in a foreign language #youmightbeaDBA  sqlrunner You treat the word 'access' as a verb, not a noun #youmightbeaDBA  sqlrunner If you are happy with sub-second performance #youmightbeaDBA  sqlrunner When you know the names of the NOC people AND their families #youmightbeadba  sqlrunner When you know the names of the NOC people AND their families #youmightbeadba  sqlrunner Your company set's up international phone coverage for your cruise #youmightbeaDBA  sqlsamson @buckwoody if your manager asks you for data and you respond with "there's a script for that" #youmightbeadba  sqlsamson @buckwoody If you receive more messages from your server then your spouse #youmightbeadba  SQLSoldier You've spent all night Valentines Day upgrading the SQL Servers and forgot to tell your wife you'd be working late. #youmightbeadba  SQLSoldier You're flattered when someone calls you a geek. #youmightbeadba  SQLSoldier @llangit @mrdenny it's 11pm on a holiday weekend, & your reading stupid jokes on Twitter then #youmightbeadba  SQLSoldier Your manager borrows lunch money from you because your salary is 30% higher than his. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You think "intellisense" is a double negative because it's not intelligent nor makes sense. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier 75% of the emails you receive at home have the phrase "now following you on Twitter!" in the subject line. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You petition Ken Burns to remake Office Space because it should have been 18 hours long. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You select a candidate for a Jr DBA position because his resume said he's willing to get your coffee. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Somebody misquotes @PaulRandall and you call him on your cell to verify. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You wish the elevator in your building was slower because it's the last time you'll be left alone all day. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier The developers sacrifice small animals before giving you their code for review. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Developers bring you coffee and a BLT when you review their code. #youmightbeaDBA #IWish  SQLSoldier You can get out of any family get-together by saying you have to work and nobody questions it. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You've requested a HP Superdome for you "test" box. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your leave work early because your internet connection to the data center is better at home #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier The new CEO asks you to justify your salary, so you go on vacation for 2 weeks. And he never questions you again. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You cheer when Milton burns down the company in Office Space #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier A dev. asks if you've heard about some great new feature in SQL and you show the 16 blog posts you wrote on it ... last year #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your dev team is still testing SQL 2008 and you're already planning for SQL 11. #youmightbeaDBA #TrueStory  SQLSoldier The new CEO asks you to justify your salary, so you go on vacation for 2 weeks. And he never questions you again. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your dev team is still testing SQL 2008 and you're already planning for SQL 11. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You use a cell phone service coverage map to plan your next vacation. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You come in to work at 7 AM because it gives you at least 3 hours without any developers around. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You figure out a way to make take your wife on a cruise and deduct it as a business expense. #youmightbeaDBA #sqlcruise  SQLSoldier You name your cat SQLDog because the name @SQLCat was already taken. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You rate your blog posts based on the number of retweets you get. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You disable random logins just to mess with people. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You fall for the pickup line, "Hey baby, what's your collation?" #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You can blame an outage on anyone in the company because you're the only one that knows how to find out what really happened #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You can blame an outage on anyone in the company because you're the only one that knows how to find out what really happened #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You cheer when Milton burns down the company in Office Space #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your leave work early because your internet connection to the data center is better at home #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You cheer when Milton burns down the company in Office Space #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your think the 4 food groups are coffee, bacon, fast food, and Mountain Dew. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You tell someone your job title and they ask "What?" You describe it and they ask "What?". So you say "computer geek". #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier The #1 referrer to your blog is Twitter.com. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your idea of a good time on a Saturday involves free training. #youmightbeaDBA #sqlsat43  SQLSoldier You write a book that all of your co-workers have and none have read it. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You write a book that sells a couple thousand copies and is heralded a best seller. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier No matter how sick you are, you go to work if it's time to pass the pager on to the next guy. #youmightbeaDBA #TrueStory  SQLSoldier You go out on the town, and strangers walk up to you and say, "Hey you're that SQL guy" #youmightbeaDBA #TrueStory  SQLSoldier Your wife asks you to fix something, and you request a downtime window. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your wife asks when you'll be home, and you tell her that you wish you knew. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your best pickup line, "Hey baby, what's your collation?" #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your wife asks when you'll be home, and you tell her that you wish you knew. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You know that @BuckWoody is not someone's porno name. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You list TSQL as your native language on the 2010 census. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Starbucks' stock price drops every time you go on vacation. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You're happy when the web master says that the website is down. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You know that @BuckWoody is not someone's porno name. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You get mad when someone calls your car a "heap" because you've always considered it to be a "clustered index". #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier Your blog has more hits than your company's website. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You systematically remove the asterisk key from all keyboards in the company except yours. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier When asked if you recycle, you reply that you run sp_cycle_errorlog every night at midnight #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You wouldn't allow someone named @AdamMachanic to work on your car. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You switch offices every 3 days to avoid developers #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier PSS has your number on speed dial. #youmightbeaDBA  SQLSoldier You frown when you they tell Neo that he's going to the Oracle #youmightbeaDBA  swhaley you regretted saying "This shouldn't effect production" #youmightbeaDBA  swhaley you regretted saying "This shouldn't effect production" #youmightbeaDBA  Tarwn A pleasurable saturday means spending the day learning more about what you already do the rest of the week #youmightbeaDBA ...oh, wait...  thelostforum For great justice; all our base are belong to YOU !! #youmightbeadba  thelostforum @SQLSoldier: You need a witness to use a mirror #youmightbeaDBA ;)  TimCost you capitalize key words. always. everywhere. you can't help it, usually don't even notice. #youmightbeaDBA  Toshana Your the only one in your company not impressed with the developers new application. #youmightbeaDBA  venzann Coming soon from a (respected) book publisher - @buckwoody's #youmightbeaDBA  venzann He's on a role tonight. @buckwoody is summing up my life with his #youmightbeaDBA tweets...  venzann I love the #youmightbeaDBA tag. Found at least 6 new DBAs to follow..  venzann He's on a role tonight. @buckwoody is summing up my life with his #youmightbeaDBA tweets...  venzann You use #sqlhelp as a primary resource during troubleshooting #youmightbeaDBA  venzann You insist on stricter password security for your sql servers than you implement on your own laptop #youmightbeaDBA  WesBrownSQL @buckwoody you are up so late the only tweets you see are from @buckwoody #youmightbeaDBA  WesBrownSQL @SQLSoldier you are upgrading all your 2005 prod servers to 2008 R2 on a three day weekend... #youmightbeaDBA  zippy1981 #youmightbeaDBA if everytime you do something with #mongodb you think of the Vulcan proverb "only Nixon could go to China."  Share this post: email it! | bookmark it! | digg it! | reddit! | kick it! | live it!

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  • SQL SERVER – Solution of Puzzle – Swap Value of Column Without Case Statement

    - by pinaldave
    Earlier this week I asked a question where I asked how to Swap Values of the column without using CASE Statement. Read here: SQL SERVER – A Puzzle – Swap Value of Column Without Case Statement. I have proposed 3 different solutions in the blog posts itself. I had requested the help of the community to come up with alternate solutions and honestly I am stunned and amazed by the qualified entries. I will be not able to cover every single solution which is posted as a comment, however, I would like to for sure cover few interesting entries. However, I am selecting 5 solutions which are different (not necessary they are most optimal or best – just different and interesting). Just for clarity I am involving the original problem statement here. USE tempdb GO CREATE TABLE SimpleTable (ID INT, Gender VARCHAR(10)) GO INSERT INTO SimpleTable (ID, Gender) SELECT 1, 'female' UNION ALL SELECT 2, 'male' UNION ALL SELECT 3, 'male' GO SELECT * FROM SimpleTable GO -- Insert Your Solutions here -- Swap value of Column Gender SELECT * FROM SimpleTable GO DROP TABLE SimpleTable GO Here are the five most interesting and different solutions I have received. Solution by Roji P Thomas UPDATE S SET S.Gender = D.Gender FROM SimpleTable S INNER JOIN SimpleTable D ON S.Gender != D.Gender I really loved the solutions as it is very simple and drives the point home – elegant and will work pretty much for any values (not necessarily restricted by the option in original question ‘male’ or ‘female’). Solution by Aneel CREATE TABLE #temp(id INT, datacolumn CHAR(4)) INSERT INTO #temp VALUES(1,'gent'),(2,'lady'),(3,'lady') DECLARE @value1 CHAR(4), @value2 CHAR(4) SET @value1 = 'lady' SET @value2 = 'gent' UPDATE #temp SET datacolumn = REPLACE(@value1 + @value2,datacolumn,'') Aneel has very interesting solution where he combined both the values and replace the original value. I personally liked this creativity of the solution. Solution by SIJIN KUMAR V P UPDATE SimpleTable SET Gender = RIGHT(('fe'+Gender), DIFFERENCE((Gender),SOUNDEX(Gender))*2) Sijin has amazed me with Difference and Soundex function. I have never visualized that above two functions can resolve the problem. Hats off to you Sijin. Solution by Nikhildas UPDATE St SET St.Gender = t.Gender FROM SimpleTable St CROSS Apply (SELECT DISTINCT gender FROM SimpleTable WHERE St.Gender != Gender) t I was expecting that someone will come up with this solution where they use CROSS APPLY. This is indeed very neat and for sure interesting exercise. If you do not know how CROSS APPLY works this is the time to learn. Solution by mistermagooo UPDATE SimpleTable SET Gender=X.NewGender FROM (VALUES('male','female'),('female','male')) AS X(OldGender,NewGender) WHERE SimpleTable.Gender=X.OldGender As per author this is a slow solution but I love how syntaxes are placed and used here. I love how he used syntax here. I will say this is the most beautifully written solution (not necessarily it is best). Bonus: Solution by Madhivanan Somehow I was confident Madhi – SQL Server MVP will come up with something which I will be compelled to read. He has written a complete blog post on this subject and I encourage all of you to go ahead and read it. Now personally I wanted to list every single comment here. There are some so good that I am just amazed with the creativity. I will write a part of this blog post in future. However, here is the challenge for you. Challenge: Go over 50+ various solutions listed to the simple problem here. Here are my two asks for you. 1) Pick your best solution and list here in the comment. This exercise will for sure teach us one or two things. 2) Write your own solution which is yet not covered already listed 50 solutions. I am confident that there is no end to creativity. Reference: Pinal Dave (http://blog.SQLAuthority.com) Filed under: PostADay, SQL, SQL Authority, SQL Function, SQL Puzzle, SQL Query, SQL Server, SQL Tips and Tricks, T SQL, Technology

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  • SQL SERVER – A Puzzle – Swap Value of Column Without Case Statement

    - by pinaldave
    For the last few weeks, I have been doing Friday Puzzles and I am really loving it. Yesterday I received a very interesting question by Navneet Chaurasia on Facebook Page. He was asked this question in one of the interview questions for job. Please read the original thread for a complete idea of the conversation. I am presenting the same question here. Puzzle Let us assume there is a single column in the table called Gender. The challenge is to write a single update statement which will flip or swap the value in the column. For example if the value in the gender column is ‘male’ swap it with ‘female’ and if the value is ‘female’ swap it with ‘male’. Here is the quick setup script for the puzzle. USE tempdb GO CREATE TABLE SimpleTable (ID INT, Gender VARCHAR(10)) GO INSERT INTO SimpleTable (ID, Gender) SELECT 1, 'female' UNION ALL SELECT 2, 'male' UNION ALL SELECT 3, 'male' GO SELECT * FROM SimpleTable GO The above query will return following result set. The puzzle was to write a single update column which will generate following result set. There are multiple answers to this simple puzzle. Let me show you three different ways. I am assuming that the column will have either value ‘male’ or ‘female’ only. Method 1: Using CASE Statement I believe this is going to be the most popular solution as we are all familiar with CASE Statement. UPDATE SimpleTable SET Gender = CASE Gender WHEN 'male' THEN 'female' ELSE 'male' END GO SELECT * FROM SimpleTable GO Method 2: Using REPLACE  Function I totally understand it is the not cleanest solution but it will for sure work in giving situation. UPDATE SimpleTable SET Gender = REPLACE(('fe'+Gender),'fefe','') GO SELECT * FROM SimpleTable GO Method 3: Using IIF in SQL Server 2012 If you are using SQL Server 2012 you can use IIF and get the same effect as CASE statement. UPDATE SimpleTable SET Gender = IIF(Gender = 'male', 'female', 'male') GO SELECT * FROM SimpleTable GO You can read my article series on SQL Server 2012 various functions over here. SQL SERVER – Denali – Logical Function – IIF() – A Quick Introduction SQL SERVER – Detecting Leap Year in T-SQL using SQL Server 2012 – IIF, EOMONTH and CONCAT Function Let us clean up. DROP TABLE SimpleTable GO Question to you: I came up with three simple tricks where there is a single UPDATE statement which swaps the values in the column. Do you know any other simple trick? If yes, please post here in the comments. I will pick two random winners from all the valid answers. Winners will get 1) Print Copy of SQL Server Interview Questions and Answers 2) Free Learning Code for Online Video Courses I will announce the winners on coming Monday. Reference:  Pinal Dave (http://blog.SQLAuthority.com) Filed under: CodeProject, PostADay, SQL, SQL Authority, SQL Interview Questions and Answers, SQL Puzzle, SQL Query, SQL Server, SQL Tips and Tricks, SQLServer, T SQL, Technology

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  • Get Current QuarterEnd for a given FYE Date

    - by Rohit Gupta
    Here is the code to get the Current Quarter End for a Given FYE Date: 1: public static DateTime ThisQuarterEnd(this DateTime date, DateTime fyeDate) 2: { 3: IEnumerable<DateTime> candidates = 4: QuartersInYear(date.Year, fyeDate.Month).Union(QuartersInYear(date.Year + 1, fyeDate.Month)); 5: return candidates.Where(d => d.Subtract(date).Days >= 0).First(); 6: } 7:  8: public static IEnumerable<DateTime> QuartersInYear(int year, int q4Month) 9: { 10: int q1Month = 3, q2Month = 6, q3Month = 9; 11: int q1year = year, q2year = year, q3year = year; 12: int q1Day = 31, q2Day = 31, q3Day = 31, q4Day = 31; 13:  14: 15: q3Month = q4Month - 3; 16: if (q3Month <= 0) 17: { 18: q3Month = q3Month + 12; 19: q3year = year - 1; 20: } 21: q2Month = q4Month - 6; 22: if (q2Month <= 0) 23: { 24: q2Month = q2Month + 12; 25: q2year = year - 1; 26: } 27: q1Month = q4Month - 9; 28: if (q1Month <= 0) 29: { 30: q1Month = q1Month + 12; 31: q1year = year - 1; 32: } 33:  34: q1Day = new DateTime(q1year, q1Month, 1).AddMonths(1).AddDays(-1).Day; 35: q2Day = new DateTime(q2year, q2Month, 1).AddMonths(1).AddDays(-1).Day; 36: q3Day = new DateTime(q3year, q3Month, 1).AddMonths(1).AddDays(-1).Day; 37: q4Day = new DateTime(year, q4Month, 1).AddMonths(1).AddDays(-1).Day; 38:  39: return new List<DateTime>() { 40: new DateTime(q1year, q1Month, q1Day), 41: new DateTime(q2year, q2Month, q2Day), 42: new DateTime(q3year, q3Month, q3Day), 43: new DateTime(year, q4Month, q4Day), 44: }; 45:  46: } The code to get the NextQuarterEnd is simple, just Change the Where clause to read d.Subtract(date).Days > 0 instead of d.Subtract(date).Days >= 0 1: public static DateTime NextQuarterEnd(this DateTime date, DateTime fyeDate) 2: { 3: IEnumerable<DateTime> candidates = 4: QuartersInYear(date.Year, fyeDate.Month).Union(QuartersInYear(date.Year + 1, fyeDate.Month)); 5: return candidates.Where(d => d.Subtract(date).Days > 0).First(); 6: } Also if you need to get the Quarter Label for a given Date, given a particular FYE date then following is the code to use: 1: public static string GetQuarterLabel(this DateTime date, DateTime fyeDate) 2: { 3: int q1Month = fyeDate.Month - 9, q2Month = fyeDate.Month - 6, q3Month = fyeDate.Month - 3; 4:  5: int year = date.Year, q1Year = date.Year, q2Year = date.Year, q3Year = date.Year; 6: 7: if (q1Month <= 0) 8: { 9: q1Month += 12; 10: q1Year = year + 1; 11: } 12: if (q2Month <= 0) 13: { 14: q2Month += 12; 15: q2Year = year + 1; 16: } 17: if (q3Month <= 0) 18: { 19: q3Month += 12; 20: q3Year = year + 1; 21: } 22:  23: string qtr = ""; 24: if (date.Month == q1Month) 25: { 26: qtr = "Qtr1"; 27: year = q1Year; 28: } 29: else if (date.Month == q2Month) 30: { 31: qtr = "Qtr2"; 32: year = q2Year; 33: } 34: else if (date.Month == q3Month) 35: { 36: qtr = "Qtr3"; 37: year = q3Year; 38: } 39: else if (date.Month == fyeDate.Month) 40: { 41: qtr = "Qtr4"; 42: year = date.Year; 43: } 44:  45: return string.Format("{0} - {1}", qtr, year.ToString()); 46: }

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  • When row estimation goes wrong

    - by Dave Ballantyne
    Whilst working at a client site, I hit upon one of those issues that you are not sure if that this is something entirely new or a bug or a gap in your knowledge. The client had a large query that needed optimizing.  The query itself looked pretty good, no udfs, UNION ALL were used rather than UNION, most of the predicates were sargable other than one or two minor ones.  There were a few extra joins that could be eradicated and having fixed up the query I then started to dive into the plan. I could see all manor of spills in the hash joins and the sort operations,  these are caused when SQL Server has not reserved enough memory and has to write to tempdb.  A VERY expensive operation that is generally avoidable.  These, however, are a symptom of a bad row estimation somewhere else, and when that bad estimation is combined with other estimation errors, chaos can ensue. Working my way back down the plan, I found the cause, and the more I thought about it the more i came convinced that the optimizer could be making a much more intelligent choice. First step is to reproduce and I was able to simplify the query down a single join between two tables, Product and ProductStatus,  from a business point of view, quite fundamental, find the status of particular products to show if ‘active’ ,’inactive’ or whatever. The query itself couldn’t be any simpler The estimated plan looked like this: Ignore the “!” warning which is a missing index, but notice that Products has 27,984 rows and the join outputs 14,000. The actual plan shows how bad that estimation of 14,000 is : So every row in Products has a corresponding row in ProductStatus.  This is unsurprising, in fact it is guaranteed,  there is a trusted FK relationship between the two columns.  There is no way that the actual output of the join can be different from the input. The optimizer is already partly aware of the foreign key meta data, and that can be seen in the simplifiction stage. If we drop the Description column from the query: the join to ProductStatus is optimized out. It serves no purpose to the query, there is no data required from the table and the optimizer knows that the FK will guarantee that a matching row will exist so it has been removed. Surely the same should be applied to the row estimations in the initial example, right ?  If you think so, please upvote this connect item. So what are our options in fixing this error ? Simply changing the join to a left join will cause the optimizer to think that we could allow the rows not to exist. or a subselect would also work However, this is a client site, Im not able to change each and every query where this join takes place but there is a more global switch that will fix this error,  TraceFlag 2301. This is described as, perhaps loosely, “Enable advanced decision support optimizations”. We can test this on the original query in isolation by using the “QueryTraceOn” option and lo and behold our estimated plan now has the ‘correct’ estimation. Many thanks goes to Paul White (b|t) for his help and keeping me sane through this

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  • Oracle command hangs when using view for "WHERE x IN..." subquery

    - by Calvin Fisher
    I'm working on a web service that fetches data from an oracle data source in chunks and passes it back to an indexing/search tool in XML format. I'm the C#/.NET guy, and am kind of fuzzy on parts of Oracle. Our Oracle team gave us the following script to run, and it works well: SELECT ROWID, [columns] FROM [table] WHERE ROWID IN ( SELECT ROWID FROM ( SELECT ROWID FROM [table] WHERE ROWID > '[previous_batch_last_rowid]' ORDER BY ROWID ) WHERE ROWNUM <= 10000 ) ORDER BY ROWID 10,000 rows is an arbitrary but reasonable chunk size and ROWID is sufficiently unique for our purposes to use as a UID since each indexing run hits only one table at a time. Bracketed values are filled in programmatically by the web service. Now we're going to start adding views to the indexing, each of which will union a few separate tables. Since ROWID would no longer function as a unique identifier, they added a column to the views (VIEW_UNIQUE_ID) that concatenates the ROWIDs from the component tables to construct a UID for each union. But this script does not work, even though it follows the same form as the previous one: SELECT VIEW_UNIQUE_ID, [columns] FROM [view] WHERE VIEW_UNIQUE_ID IN ( SELECT VIEW_UNIQUE_ID FROM ( SELECT VIEW_UNIQUE_ID FROM [view] WHERE ROWID > '[previous_batch_last_view_unique_id]' ORDER BY VIEW_UNIQUE_ID ) WHERE ROWNUM <= 10000 ) ORDER BY VIEW_UNIQUE_ID It hangs indefinitely with no response from the Oracle server. I've waited 20+ minutes and the SQLTools dialog box indicating a running query remains the same, with no progress or updates. I've tested each subquery independently and each works fine and takes a very short amount of time (<= 1 second), so the view itself is sound. But as soon as the inner two SELECT queries are added with "WHERE VIEW_UNIQUE_ID IN...", it hangs. Why doesn't this query work for views? In what important way are they not interchangeable here?

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  • Polymorphic NHibernate mappings

    - by Ben Aston
    I have an interface IUserLocation and a concrete type UserLocation. When I use ICriteria, specifying the interface IUserLocation, I want NHibernate to instantiate a collection of the concrete UserLocation type. I have created an HBM mapping file using the table per concrete type strategy (shown below). However, when I query NHibernate using ICriteria I get: NHibernate cannot instantiate abstract class or interface MyNamespace.IUserLocation Can anyone see why this is? (source code for the relevant bit of NHibernate here (I think)) My ICriteria: var filter = DetachedCriteria.For<IUserLocation>() .Add(Restrictions.Eq("UserId", userId)); return filter.GetExecutableCriteria(UoW.Session) .List<IUserLocation>(); My mapping file: <hibernate-mapping xmlns="urn:nhibernate-mapping-2.2" default-lazy="true"> <class xmlns="urn:nhibernate-mapping-2.2" name="MyNamespace.IUserLocation,MyAssembly" abstract="true" table="IUserLocations"> <composite-id> <key-property name="UserId" column="UserId" type="System.Guid"></key-property> <key-many-to-one name="Location" column="LocationId" class="MyNamespace.ILocation,MyAssembly"></key-many-to-one> </composite-id> <union-subclass table="UserLocations" name="MyNamespace2.UserLocation,MyAssembly2"> <property name="IsAdmin" /> </union-subclass> </class> </hibernate-mapping>

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  • How to add some complexe structure in multiple places in an XML file

    - by Guillaume
    I have an XML file which has many section like the one below : <Operations> <Action [some attibutes ...]> [some complexe content ...] </Action> <Action [some attibutes ...]> [some complexe content ...] </Action> </Operations> I have to add an to every . It seems that an XSLT should be a good solution to this problem : <xsl:template match="Operations/Action[last()]"> <xsl:copy> <xsl:apply-templates select="@*|node()"/> </xsl:copy> <Action>[some complexe content ...]</Action> </xsl:template> <xsl:template match="@*|node()"> <xsl:copy> <xsl:apply-templates select="@*|node()"/> </xsl:copy> </xsl:template> My problem is that the content of my contains some xPath expressions. For exemple : <Action code="p_histo01"> <customScript languageCode="gel"> <gel:script xmlns:core="jelly:core" xmlns:gel="jelly:com.niku.union.gel.GELTagLibrary" xmlns:soap="jelly:com.niku.union.gel.SOAPTagLibrary" xmlns:soap-env="http://schemas.xmlsoap.org/soap/envelope/" xmlns:sql="jelly:sql" xmlns:x="jelly:xml" xmlns:xog="http://www.niku.com/xog" xmlns:xsi="http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema-instance"> <sql:param value="${gel_stepInstanceId}"/> </gel:script> </customScript> </Action> The '${gel_stepInstanceId}' is interpreted by my XSLT but I would like it to be copied as-is. Is that posible ? How ?

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  • MySQL & PHP - select/option lists and showing data to users that still allows me to generate queries

    - by Andrew Heath
    Sorry for the unclear title, an example will clear things up: TABLE: Scenario_victories ID scenid timestamp userid side playdate 1 RtBr001 2010-03-15 17:13:36 7 1 2010-03-10 2 RtBr001 2010-03-15 17:13:36 7 1 2010-03-10 3 RtBr001 2010-03-15 17:13:51 7 2 2010-03-10 ID and timestamp are auto-insertions by the database when the other 4 fields are added. The first thing to note is that a user can record multiple playings of the same scenario (scenid) on the same date (playdate) possibly with the same outcome (side = winner). Hence the need for the unique ID and timestamps for good measure. Now, on their user page, I'm displaying their recorded play history in a <select><option>... list form with 2 buttons at the end - Delete Record and Go to Scenario My script takes the scenid and after hitting a few other tables returns with something more user-friendly like: (playdate) (from scenid) (from side) ######################################################### # 2010-03-10 Road to Berlin #1 -- Germany, Hungary won # # 2010-03-10 Road to Berlin #1 -- Germany, Hungary won # # 2010-03-10 Road to Berlin #1 -- Soviet Union won # ######################################################### [Delete Record] [Go To Scenario] in HTML: <select name="history" size=3> <option>2010-03-10 Road to Berlin #1 -- Germany, Hungary won</option> <option>2010-03-10 Road to Berlin #1 -- Germany, Hungary won</option> <option>2010-03-10 Road to Berlin #1 -- Soviet Union won</option> </select> Now, if you were to highlight the first record and click Go to Scenario there is enough information there for me to parse it and produce the exact scenario you want to see. However, if you were to select Delete Record there is not - I have the playdate and I can parse the scenid and side from what's listed, but in this example all three records would have the same result. I appear to have painted myself into a corner. Does anyone have a suggestion as to how I can get some unique identifying data (ID and/or timestamp) to ride along on this form without showing it to the user? PHP-only please, I must be NoScript compliant!

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  • Lua Operator Overloading

    - by Pessimist
    I've found some places on the web saying that operators in Lua are overloadable but I can't seem to find any example. Can someone provide an example of, say, overloading the + operator to work like the .. operator works for string concatenation? EDIT 1: to Alexander Gladysh and RBerteig: If operator overloading only works when both operands are the same type and changing this behavior wouldn't be easy, then how come the following code works? (I don't mean any offense, I just started learning this language): printf = function(fmt, ...) io.write(string.format(fmt, ...)) end Set = {} Set.mt = {} -- metatable for sets function Set.new (t) local set = {} setmetatable(set, Set.mt) for _, l in ipairs(t) do set[l] = true end return set end function Set.union (a,b) -- THIS IS THE PART THAT MANAGES OPERATOR OVERLOADING WITH OPERANDS OF DIFFERENT TYPES -- if user built new set using: new_set = some_set + some_number if type(a) == "table" and type(b) == "number" then print("building set...") local mixedset = Set.new{} for k in pairs(a) do mixedset[k] = true end mixedset[b] = true return mixedset -- elseif user built new set using: new_set = some_number + some_set elseif type(b) == "table" and type(a) == "number" then print("building set...") local mixedset = Set.new{} for k in pairs(b) do mixedset[k] = true end mixedset[a] = true return mixedset end if getmetatable(a) ~= Set.mt or getmetatable(b) ~= Set.mt then error("attempt to 'add' a set with a non-set value that is also not a number", 2) end local res = Set.new{} for k in pairs(a) do res[k] = true end for k in pairs(b) do res[k] = true end return res end function Set.tostring (set) local s = "{" local sep = "" for e in pairs(set) do s = s .. sep .. e sep = ", " end return s .. "}" end function Set.print (s) print(Set.tostring(s)) end s1 = Set.new{10, 20, 30, 50} s2 = Set.new{30, 1} Set.mt.__add = Set.union -- now try to make a new set by unioning a set plus a number: s3 = s1 + 8 Set.print(s3) --> {1, 10, 20, 30, 50}

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  • How can I get a distinct list of elements in a hierarchical query?

    - by RenderIn
    I have a database table, with people identified by a name, a job and a city. I have a second table that contains a hierarchical representation of every job in the company in every city. Suppose I have 3 people in the people table: [name(PK),title,city] Jim, Salesman, Houston Jane, Associate Marketer, Chicago Bill, Cashier, New York And I have thousands of job type/location combinations in the job table, a sample of which follow. You can see the hierarchical relationship since parent_title is a foreign key to title: [title,city,pay,parent_title] Salesman, Houston, $50000, CEO Cashier, Houston, $25000 CEO, USA, $1000000 Associate Marketer, Chicago, $75000 Senior Marketer, Chicago, $125000 ..... The problem I'm having is that my Person table is a composite key, so I don't know how to structure the start with part of my query so that it starts with each of the three jobs in the cities I specified. I can execute three separate queries to get what I want, but this doesn't scale well. e.g.: select * from jobs start with city = (select city from people where name = 'Bill') and title = (select title from people where name = 'Bill') connect by prior parent_title = title UNION select * from jobs start with city = (select city from people where name = 'Jim') and title = (select title from people where name = 'Jim') connect by prior parent_title = title UNION select * from jobs start with city = (select city from people where name = 'Jane') and title = (select title from people where name = 'Jane') connect by prior parent_title = title How else can I get a distinct list (or I could wrap it with a distinct if not possible) of all the jobs which are above the three people I specified?

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