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  • MongoDB, 5 characters, and a free job board

    Today I came across shapado.com - a StackExchange-like open source system running on ruby and mongodb. It took a couple clicks and a few keystroke, and I had http://jobs.shapado.com/ setup and running for free. It was a quasi joke at first, but I figured it might be helpful to get this up and running. So, if you have any jobs to post, or would like to request work, please post away :) You can also set up your own, or download the source from the seemingly unreliable gitorious.    ...Did you know that DotNetSlackers also publishes .net articles written by top known .net Authors? We already have over 80 articles in several categories including Silverlight. Take a look: here.

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  • FlasCC requirements and limitations?

    - by Arthur Wulf White
    It is now available for download. It says you need twice* as many bits as I have. Why would you need more bits to compile code? Does that mean you need more bits to run flash games writtes with flasCC Did anyone try it out and happens to know the answers? http://gaming.adobe.com/technologies/flascc/ Minimum system requirements Flash Player 11 or higher Flex SDK 4.6 or higher Java Virtual Machine (64-bit) Windows Microsoft® Windows® 7 (64-bit edition) Cygwin (included) *This is meant as a joke. however I do own a 32-bit laptop and I am wondering why you need 64-bit. Afaik - You only need 64-bit if you want to run a system that has more than 4gigs of memory. Why would any flash game require more than 4 gigs of memory. The only system that is 64-bits and does not have 4gigs of memory that I can quickly recall is that hilarious Nintendo that came ages ago with a Motorola CPU.

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  • How can I implement an Iris Wipe effect?

    - by Vandell
    For those who doesn't know: An iris wipe is a wipe that takes the shape of a growing or shrinking circle. It has been frequently used in animated short subjects, such as those in the Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies cartoon series, to signify the end of a story. When used in this manner, the iris wipe may be centered around a certain focal point and may be used as a device for a "parting shot" joke, a fourth wall-breaching wink by a character, or other purposes. Example from flasheff.com Your answer may or may not include a coding sample, a language agnostic explanation is considered enough.

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  • 2010 SQLPeople Person of the Year

    - by andyleonard
    Introduction Back in 2010, I started recognizing the SQLPeople Person of the Year. It's been a tradition ever since. "But Andy, you're writing this in 2010." Yep. Good eye, Pep. The Award Goes To: Steve Jones ( Blog | @way0utwest ). I am not a DBA - I'm a database developer. I joke and say I look like the world's greatest DBA when there's no contention, the jobs are finishing successfully, queries return data quickly and accurately, and the backups succeed. But anyone looks like the world's greatest...(read more)

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  • What's in a Name

    - by PointsToShare
    © 2011 By: Dov Trietsch. All rights reserved Microsoft – What’s in a name?   Long ago I heard a dentist joke. It went like this: A dentist went to a conference and at night he picked this girl and they went to his room. In the morning after, she asked: “Are you a dentist?” “Yes.” Said he. “You must be a very good one.” “I am. How did you guess?” “I didn’t feel a thing!!” That let my wild imagination roam. “Had it been Bill gates,” I thought, “the punch line would have been: ‘Now I know why you called it Microsoft!!” That's All Folks

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  • SQL Server 2012 Cumulative Update #1 is available!

    - by AaronBertrand
    While I joked earlier this month that SQL Server 2012 Service Pack 1 was released on the same day as General Availability (hey, it's Microsoft's fault since they decided to GA on April 1), this time it isn't a joke. Today Microsoft has released Cumulative Update #1 for SQL Server 2012 . About half of the fixes affect the database engine. Analysis Services and Data Quality Services make up the bulk of the remainder. If you're running SQL Server 2012 now, I suggest you apply the update. This would...(read more)

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  • Intro to NoSQL with RavenDB

    - by dgreen
    I did a talk on RavenDB back on 9/19/2012. Here was my abstract: "RavenDB is a document database which is gaining popularity in the 'NoSQL' movement. This session will introduce you to some non-relational concepts and describe how they compare/contrast with the relational solutions you're already familiar with. We'll go through the basics of RavenDB and show how easy it is to use from .NET” My next goal is to figure out how to post the slidedeck here (and maybe the code samples if I'm feeling ambitious). Then, the slides can be downloaded for only three easy payments of $39.99. However  for this one time special offer they are currently being given away absolutely FREE with a signup to http://meetup.trinug.org Footnote: I probably shouldn't have to say this, but my last comment about charging for my slidedeck was a joke. I have an odd sense of humor for those who don't already know me :)

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  • SQL Server 2012 Service Pack 1 is available - this time for sure!

    - by AaronBertrand
    Last week I mentioned in passing that Service Pack 1 is now available, while I was blogging from the PASS Summit keynote . I wanted to put up an official post instead of having it appear as a footnote there (I also updated my April Fools' joke to point to the right place). Service Pack 1 Details Service Pack 1 is build # 11.0.3000 and includes 13 fixes to public KB items and 35 other internal (VSTS) items. You can see the list of fixes in KB #2674319 . You can also read about new features included...(read more)

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  • How to fend off external interuptions?

    - by Demian Kasier
    I want to keep my focus at work, but I am constontly interupted. examples: - the boss asks something to the whole team. - a coleague asks something about a piece of code I wrote - something funny on the radio - smalltalk among coleages with a joke in between. - ... As extra info: We are a team of 6 developpers in one room, with sales and suits constantly coming over to ask and tell us things we must and mustn't do. So how do you keep you focus and attention to your work? so you can get some things done, instead of answering to everyone and everything that interupts you?

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  • Is it common in companies that non-techs are doing analyzes

    - by Kubi
    It's been 2 months since I started working at an international big consulting company. I like my colleagues personally but it's like a joke since my first day. Analysts (people who has no idea about the tech. background) are planning the workflow and functions. In my case, none of my friends here even wrote even a single line of html. When I say Html, I doubt if they know what I mean. But they are deciding about really key decisions in a web system implementation project. Is this always like this?

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  • Fresh start outside Google's crapbox [on hold]

    - by Krzysztof Minister Bytu
    I might have been experimenting with my website too much and Google first cut the flow of visitors considerably and now I didn't get one for 4 days already. It's a joke that they've done this, because I've put a lot of work into it, but that's a topic for another day. My question is about further avoiding it. I want to take the partly improved design from that website onto a new one and get a new domain name. The question is: in that case, do I have to change the hosting option (it has my old website name in the address), or is changing the domain enough for Google to treat it as something new from a "fresh user". In other words, does Google get through the domain address and log into the actual hosting address? I'd hate to waste another few months of hard work, so I prefer to take every possible precaution but not paying for another hosting would make things easier on the wallet.

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  • SQL Server 2012 Service Pack 1 is available - this time for sure!

    - by AaronBertrand
    Last week I mentioned in passing that Service Pack 1 is now available, while I was blogging from the PASS Summit keynote . I wanted to put up an official post instead of having it appear as a footnote there (I also updated my April Fools' joke to point to the right place). Service Pack 1 Details Service Pack 1 is build # 11.0.3000 and includes 13 fixes to public KB items and 35 other internal (VSTS) items. You can see the list of fixes in KB #2674319 . You can also read about new features included...(read more)

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  • What is wrong with me - bug problem? [closed]

    - by reizals
    I have about 6 years exp. in app. development. Not so long ago I had moved to another company and the problem has started. I ready don't know why the last time Im making so many bugs/mistakes. Of course Im testing the functionality before I send message that its "done", but I really don't know why I can't see trivial bugs. Some time it looks like I didnt test anything, but its not true. Ive always had this problems but now its pain in the a.s. My question is very simple, what happened to me ;)? Ok, joke aside. What do you do to avoid simple mistakes? plzzz don't tell me to use TDD. The project is... legacy and Im really sick and tired to fix it and adding more bugs into it. best regards

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  • Mysql not working

    - by dreamcoder
    I have installed XAMPP installed in my linux machine and phpmyadmin is working fine. But when I tried to start mysql using console using mysql command, I am getting the following error. ERROR 2002 (HY000): Can't connect to local MySQL server through socket '/var/lib/mysql/mysql.sock' (2) The same error is getting when I try to use cake php bake console ** since I have istalled XAMPP , there is no folder named mysql in /var/lib Can you help me?

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  • Clipping users cursor around the X button.

    - by Nowayz
    This should be simple, and I was hoping to do it in Delphi. The purpose of this is just supposed to be a joke. On a windows form application I don't want the user to be able to clip the X button on the main form. I want the cursor to either clip around the X button or just set it's position elsewhere.

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  • Twitter search API VS Operators

    - by supermogx
    I've found this page about the Twitter search API and some operators : http://search.twitter.com/operators But is it possible to make a search like : All posts containing the words "ipod OR ipad" AND all posts containing the words "funny OR joke" ? Like : "happy AND hour" OR "ipod AND ipad" this doesn't look like it's possible.

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  • Has anyone "learned how to program in 21 days?"

    - by Sheehan Alam
    I'm not a fan of these learn how to program in X amount of days books. Some even boast, learn how to program in 24 hours. This is a joke and an insult to me as a software engineer who went through a rigorous discipline in computer science and mathematics. So a question to the community, have you benefited from these become a programmer quick books?

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  • What is your favourite programming-related lolcat picture?

    - by DR
    In the spirit of these questions... http://stackoverflow.com/questions/234075/what-is-your-best-programmer-joke http://stackoverflow.com/questions/354686/programming-related-songs http://stackoverflow.com/questions/517897/anyone-know-any-programming-related-poetry ... I wonder: What is your favourite programming-related lolcat picture? Please add one answer per picture.

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  • What about WebSafe colors

    - by forgloriouskeeponlowing
    My father with whom I'm going to create a website (I just got him away from using Dreamweaver and font-tags) keeps talking about WebSafe colors he has to use for the background images. I keep telling him that that was about 1999 but he doesn't believe me. What are WebSafe colors? When and where were they needed? What the hell anyway? This is no joke.

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  • Sending Big Files with WCF

    - by Sean Feldman
    I had to look into a project that submits large files to WCF service. Implementation is based on data chunking. This is a good approach when your client and server are not both based on WCF, bud different technologies. The problem with something like this is that chunking (either you wish it or not) complicates the overall solution. Alternative would be streaming. In WCF to WCF scenario, this is a piece of cake. When client is Java, it becomes a bit more challenging (has anyone implemented Java client streaming data to WCF service?). What I really liked about .NET implementation with WCF, is that sending header info along with stream was dead simple, and from the developer point of view looked like it’s all a part of the DTO passed into the service. [ServiceContract] public interface IFileUpload { [OperationContract] void UploadFile(SendFileMessage message); } Where SendFileMessage is [MessageContract] public class SendFileMessage { [MessageBodyMember(Order = 1)] public Stream FileData; [MessageHeader(MustUnderstand = true)] public FileTransferInfo FileTransferInfo; }

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  • Absent Code attribute in method that is not native or abstract

    - by kerry
    I got the following, quite puzzling error today when running a unit test: java.lang.ClassFormatError: Absent Code attribute in method that is not native or abstract in class file javax/servlet/http/Cookie A google search found this post, which explains that it is caused by having an interface in the classpath, and not an actual implementation. In this case it’s the java-ee interface. To fix this I added the jetty servlet api implementation to my pom: jetty javax.servlet test Piece of cake. I have run in to this before, so I figured I would capture the fix here in case I run in to it again.

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  • Red Gate does Byte Night 2012

    - by red(at)work
    On the 5th of October 2012, a team of nine plucky Red Gaters braved the howling wind and the driving rain to sleep outside. No tents or mattresses were allowed – all we took for protection were sleeping bags, groundsheets, plastic sacks and Colin’s enormous fishing umbrella (a godsend in umbrella-y disguise). Why would we do such a thing? For Byte Night, an annual tech sector sleepout in support of Action for Children, who tackle the causes as well as the consequences of youth homelessness. Byte Night encourages technology professionals to do for one night a year what thousands of young people have to do every night – sleep rough.  We signed up for Byte Night in the warm, heady midst of the British summer, thinking it couldn’t possibly be all that bad. Even on the night itself – before the rain began to fall, sat in the comfort and warmth of a company canteen, drinking wine and eating chill and preparing to win the pub quiz – we were excited and optimistic about the night that lay ahead of us. All of that changed as soon as we stepped out into one of the worst rainstorms of the year. Brian, the team’s birthday boy, describes it best: Picture the scene: it’s 3 am on a Friday. I’m lying outside, fully clothed in a sleeping bag, wearing a raincoat, trussed up inside a large plastic pocket, on a ground sheet beneath a giant umbrella, wedged so tightly between two of my colleagues that I can’t move my arms. I’m wide awake, staring up at the grey sky beyond the edge of the umbrella; a limp, flickering white glow hints at a moon somewhere behind the drifting clouds. I haven’t slept since we first moved outside at 11 pm. Outside. Did I mention we were outside? I’m hung over. I need the loo. But there is no way on earth that I’m getting out of this sleeping bag. It’s cold. It’s raining. Not just raining, but chucking it down. It’s been doing this non-stop since 10pm. The rain sounds like a hyperactive drummer on the fishing umbrella, and the noise is loud and relentless. Puddles of water are forming all over the groundsheet, and, despite being ensconced inside the plastic pouch, I am wet. The fishing umbrella is protecting me from the worst of the driving rain, but not all of me is under it, and five hours of rain is no match for it. Everything is wet. My left side has become horribly damp. My trainers, which I placed next to my sleeping bag, are now completely soaked through. Mmm. That’ll be fun in the morning. My head is next to Colin’s head on one side, and a multi-pack of McCoy’s cheddar and onion crisps on the other. Don’t ask about the tub of hummus. That’s somewhere down by my ankles, abandoned to the night. Jess, who is lying next to me, rolls over onto her side. A mini waterfall cascades from her rain-pouch onto my face. Bah. I continue to stare into the heavens, willing the dawn to hurry up. Something lands on my face. It’s a mosquito. Great. Midnight, when this still seemed like fun – when we opened some champagne and my colleagues presented me with a caterpillar birthday cake, when everyone was drunk and jolly and full of stoic resolve – feels like a long time ago. Did I mention that today is my birthday? The remains of the caterpillar cake endure the same fate as the hummus, left out in the rain like a metaphor for sadness. It’s getting colder. I can see my breath. Silence has descended on the group, apart from the rustle of plastic. And the rain, obviously. Someone snores, and I envy whoever it is the sweet escape of sleep. I try to wriggle a bit further down inside my sleeping bag, but it doesn’t want to be wriggled into. Only 3 hours till dawn. 180 minutes. I begin to count them off, one at a time.  All nine of us got to go home in the morning, but thousands of children across the UK don’t have that luxury. If you’d like to sponsor the Red Gate Byte Night team, our JustGiving page can be found here.   Chris, before the outside bit actually happened. More photos from Byte Night Cambridge 2012 can be found here.

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  • Future Tech Duke

    - by Tori Wieldt
    Do you like the new Duke? Have you gotten the new Duke screensaver yet? Follow @java or Like I <3 Java on Facebook and get the latest 3D, animated "Future Tech Duke" screensaver.   If you haven't already, register now to watch the global July 7 Java 7 community celebration and learn more about Java moving forward. We are looking for questions from the community to be asked during the panel Q & A. Enter your questions as a comment here, or tweet it with #java7. There's lots of great content being created for Java 7: technical articles, videos, updated web pages (can you say "layer cake?"), T-shirts, presentations, and there will be lots of Java 7 content in the new Java Magazine. See you at the Java 7 celebration event! Duke will be there!

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